Odds And Ends, Mostly About Nothing And That's No Bull

11 May 2021

Story #1026

R. Linda:

Dragon called, but Tonya wasn't in, so I got the pleasure since she decided I'd do. I know, lucky me. Her doctor has her on Tramadol for some aches and pains she has, and she's all annoyed. Her doctor said they had to test her system (urine test) for Tramadol, and my question was, for what purpose? That's a new one for me. Was she entered in the Preakness horse race and they wanted to be sure she was drug-free? She's been on this for two years, so not sure why the drug test is the reason, but maybe it's time to go to physical therapy and work through whatever pain she is in?

I will say the pine cone crop up here was like no other I've ever seen. You couldn't walk on the lawns without crunching and rolling your ankles. Mam mentioned it to Ben, who came down the road on his tractor/mower and mowed them. The sound was weird, and a few times, some pine cones refused to die. They would come like missiles from underneath the power mower. One had to duck or go inside not to get one up their nose or in their hair, or worse, getting hit by one as a projectile and being laid flat out. 

For months, Mam has had this metal garden gazebo she wants to put up next to the pond (it reminds her of being home in the UK), so this morning, Ben comes over dressed like a gnome to help put it together. He had on a bright blue hoodie that he had upon his head, shorts that were below his knees and clunky work shoes. Me feisty Mam asked, "Is it National Gnome Day? You are dressed like one." He was in good humour and took that witty remark well. But my goodness, get that metal gazebo she has in boxes put up and stick him next to it, and she will have her very own garden gnome decoration. 

Mam's folly -- the constant rain has ruined her flowers, but you get the idea

Here is something not to buy. I ordered those glasses, which you can dial up or down. I thought, why not? Maybe they might help me with me poor eyesight. They looked cheap and stupid, but I was desperate to see, so I ordered two pairs. They arrived yesterday in a brown mailing bag that gave minimal protection. The first one was missing one eye lens and the nose piece, but you could snap them back in. However, the nose piece wouldn't stay in very long, so the first sight was not love. They are made of the cheapest, flimsiest plastic I've ever seen, and the lenses are plastic and scratch easily. The clicker to adjust focus doesn't really focus, and just one look, and you know if you wear these things, you'll ruin what's left of your eyesight. It took three months for these things to arrive, and they certainly were not worth the wait. They are currently residing in me mailbox with the flag up to be returned. Amazon asked me why I was returning them, and once again, I used language they didn't like, which was, "These things are garbage, I will be shocked Amazon would even sell them. They will ruin your eyesight!" Anyway, I got instant return approval, so this mustn't be the first time Amazon has heard of this. 

Yup, just one look, and you know these are bin-worthy

A month back, there was an alert that an animal was on the loose and to be on the lookout. I instantly thought bear or moose. Never did I think this:

Bull on the loose in backyards 

This came strolling through Ben's back 40, and he called the police, and they laughed. Never did a minion of the law show up. So he called Fish and Game, and they said ok. But they never showed. It wasn't until a day later that a neighbour came over with a lasso and horse and rounded up the dangerous animal. It is back where it belongs, but Ben will never forget the experience. Of course, no one believes him until he pulls out the photos. 

Gabe

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