12 January 2021
1016
R. Linda:
Because me Mam and I have the same birthday month and days apart, we decided to celebrate hers first over the weekend. She wasn't keen she was celebrating it on the same day as Jared Kushner's birthday, but I did tell her that Sal Mineo had the same day, so she was good. I don't know who Sal Mineo is, but she does! According to Google, he was a movie actor way before me time. I guess, being of an age, she remembers more than I even know she does. Anyway, that calmed her down a wee bit, but we started to tease her that she remembers so much because at 104, who wouldn't?
She is good-natured about it, and I think I told you when O'Hare turned 14 that we celebrated his 12th birthday—again. He was a good sport, and so was Mam about turning 104.
"It coulda bean worse," said she, "ye coulda said 105."
She wanted a cream cycle cake, but the baker did not have the mandarin oranges needed, so we asked for her second choice, Pina colada. It was touch and go there for a while, as said baker looked to see if she had any fresh pineapple. Alas, she did, and the cake was ordered. We call me Mam BamMa because the wee-est one couldn't pronounce Grandma, so we asked for the cake writing to say Happy Birthday BamMa. When we presented the 104 Birthday cake, Mam looked down and was ready to make her wish and blow out the candles when she noticed something.
"Dis cake should haf a banana smilin' up at me insteada pineapple. It says Happy Birthday Banana."
For sure it looked that way, LOL. So we sang the birthday song again but called her Banana instead of BamMa.
It took her a moment to make a wish.
"I wish Mike Pence grows some balls and duz da rite ting."
"You can't say your wish out loud, or it won't come true." O'Hare pointed out.
"Ok, den." She said and closed her eyes but wished it anyway and then blew out the three candles, missing one.
"Och! It won't come true." She said, dismayed. "Kin we haf a doo ova?"
"No!" We all sang out wanting cake.
So here's the trick, Mam baked a million cookies over the holidays to keep the kiddos occupied and everyone else on a sugar high. She ate most of the goodies because she made all her favourites. To this end, she put on a fair amount of weight and told us she was about to go on a diet. Ben was the only one who listened to her. For her birthday, he sent her grapefruits and oranges from Florida. Lots of vitamin C and the grapefruit part help with dieting.
The rest of us, not so much. She LOVES chocolate-covered cherries and has developed a wicked taste for Russell Stover's assorted cremes. Forget Quality Street Chocolates and Cadbury treats from the old sod; she's gone American when it comes to candy.
So, way before she announced the diet, we had gotten chocolate-covered cherries and assorted cremes and put them up since it was so hard to find those things during the holidays. In addition to the "real" birthday presents, each of us gave her a box of chocolates. Yes, she has three boxes of cherries and one box of Russell Stover.
Well, she's found a way to unload much of the candy. Her sitting room is at the top of the stairs, so when Tonya goes up, Mam pops out.
"Ye wan sum candy, little gal?" She says, holding an open box of chocolate-covered cherries.
She does the same with the kiddos and meself, and so far, has wiped out the Cella and Russell Stover candies. She has one and a half boxes of the Queen Anne's left. Ben's fruit be hidden where we can't get to those though. I guess she's determined to diet in spite of us. But I can't say I be not enjoying the chocolate treats every time I go upstairs. Yes, I know I will be the one who will end up with the muffin top and need to diet.
Gabe
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1 comment:
as Yoda would say "smart your mother is" ha ha
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