08 July 2020
993
R. Linda:
I will explain meself to you as I have let this ride a very long time BECAUSE you were not happy that I asked you to read the novel The Notebook. Originally, it was the book of the month selection for Tonya's book club. She was swamped with work and didn't have time to read it, so she gave it to me and said I should, so when she went to her book club she'd know all about the story.
"And don't cheat and watch the movie!" She said leaving me to it.
At first I was ok with it, until I opened the book and had read the first two pages then I was like "OH NO! A GIRLIE BOOK. A sob story, a love story, something that probably wasn't going to end well, but in a flood of tears." I tried to tell her I didn't want to read "THIS thing, it isn't me kind of story," but she didn't care she said she needed it read.
SO I had an idea. Since I knew me attention span was going to be zip to nil, I asked YOU to read it with me, all the while you thinking I be reading away, when instead I be out in me hammock with me iced tea napping in the warm afternoon breeze.
Yes, that's right, I did that. I knew you'd not disappoint and you didn't. You lambasted me arse every chance you got asking me what kind of shite was this I wanted you to read? Was I a nutter? It was stupid, it was dumb, it wasn't YOUR kind of book.
Like I didn't know that already, duh. But wait, it gets dicier. At the same time, Fionnula (you are acquainted with our Fifi), had her own blog going where she would suggest a book and then (I think there were six interested parties) her fellow readers would read the same book and afterward there would be a discussion on it. So yeah it was a book club online for "sophisticated readers of decerning taste" I believe is how Fi put it. And it was private, still is I think.
I found out about this when I heard she had somehow roped the Wolf into joining her discussion group. Seems she thinks he's very astute, brainy, and would add that intellectual appeal that would spur on her readers to really get into discussion of politics, social issues, history, etc.
Her first read was A Clockwork Orange. A rather violent, political, and social satire of young punks in Britain. Well, it seems the Wolf whipped up on all her readers as they just didn't get it. After that Fi's book club read something not as complicated, Little Women, which bit of fluff annoyed the Wolf and he pretty much wiped the floor with Ms. Fi and suggested if she was going that route, she should switch to Jane Austen and leave the transcendentalists to Henry David Thoreau and Wadsworth. Well, to keep him in the "club" she next suggested Crime and Punishment thinking that would please the Wolf and stimulate the fluff out of her readers to something deeply serious. Lets say the Wolf found the discussion deeply DISTURBING and threatened to leave her club if she didn't regulate her readership to something in-between Dostoevsky (which gave her readers with the exception of the Wolf, a massive headache) and George Orwell (whom he knew, the devil he be, would confused the hell out her and her readership).
Starting to get panicked the Wolf would really leave her group, she suggested privately to him that War and Peace might be a colossal read (she had no clue, (nor had Wolf suggested Tolstoy)), he thought she thought he'd be impressed with the choice, however, I think he'd have slit his wrists or cut his own throat if he had to be included in a "group" discussion with five people who couldn't grasp that Leaves of Grass is not a book about mowing a lawn.
"It's a tome of unbelievable proportions." Wolf told me. "I read it in university, and she thinks its something casual. She said she was going to order the book and wondered why you can get it in three volumes. She's ordering the whole thing in one bloody book. I can't wait until she sees the tiny print. If she reads it she'll be blind when she's done."
And what he didn't say but you knew he was thinking, was "AND she'll be very confused."
He did feel bad and told her not to do it. He did tell her what it was about and she agreed her readership would be lost but first and foremost when they saw the size of the tome, she agreed too, that they'd all be reading it for years to come!
So he suggested Watershed Down a book of social economics in the guise of a warren of rabbits. And you guessed it, the readership thought it a cute faery tale about bunnies and missed the social upheaval and lessons to be learned. Wolf threw up his hands and quit.
After that, Fi said she was having trouble because her readership wanted to read things like Black Beauty and even that has a moral to the story but they all missed it! When she told Wolf what she was reduced to reading he was appalled (secretly amused), and he suggested they read George Plimpton's The Curious Case of Sid Finch.
It worked, they didn't have to put any thought to the reading of that book, just enjoy it for what it was and move on like the Wolf had done, right out the door of the book club never to be seen again, he hoped.
UNTIL it came to the reading of Fi's suggestion The Notebook. Yes, indeed by that time Fi was getting bored playing Oprah Winfrey and knew her reading of classics was not for her readership, they did better with modern era books to which the Wolf had quipped at her, "So are you up to Mark Twain now?"
Not telling him what the selection was, she pleaded with him for one more read because when he was in the club, the others sat up and listened. Now they were prone to argument over silly ideas that had nothing to do with the book they were reading.
Feeling sort of sorry for her (but not really), he said ok what is the book? And she told him. He is savvy enough to know about that book and said laughingly, "Nooo."
It was at this juncture of hearing about all this from HIM that I wanted in. That sounded just up me alley if they went back to books that were classics like Henry James, or Thomas Hardy . . . yeah count me in! But Fionnula wouldn't let me join. Even after I asked her what book she was reading for the month and she told me it was the same as Tonya's book club. I did hesitate because well really? I asked if the "readership" were all women and was told me no, 3 women, 2 men, 3 when Wolf was in. Was he in I asked? "For the present moment." Was the reply.
She knew Wolf would go nutters over that book and she didn't want me to see him publicly humiliate her and her readership, that's why she wouldn't let me in. And I badgered her like no one can because I was all for seeing the Wolf in action. I knew he was vicious, unrelenting and unforgiving when it came to literature. He has a good handle on all of that and I'd like to think I do too, but I wasn't given the chance.
It wasn't I wanted to gang up on her, it was I wanted to see Wolf take all of them on and win. And he did and that was (he thought) the last time. He quit again, but I remember thinking at the time, YOU were reading it and you would have some zingers that I could use! Yes, that's the reason why I had you read that dumb book because I knew if I got in that room with Fi, her readership and the Wolf, I'd need something to back meself up with. Yes, me sneaky purpose was twofold.
Ms. Fifi somehow got one more selection put forth before the whole thing ended. Wolfie's nemesis, Herman Melville. He went berserk over Moby Dick and who could blame him? One of his chief dislikes is when an author goes off story and pounds you hard with opinions that have little to do with the story. In this case Melville was all about the story UNTIL he went off on a tangent about whales! As you can imagine, that was it for the Wolf and he was out of there.
If one can get to see her blog, the book selection had changed to real British classics and I be told a new readership (mostly women) and there be a lot of Jane Austen and the Bronte sisters being thrown around I be sure. Seems if anything Wolf was never boring and the "readership" got into the discussion between him and Ms. Fionnula (as it seemed to have happened), and it seems it was highly entertaining. I do believe Fifi served him with a cease and desist order which was exactly what he wanted to quit the book club for good and HE DID! All was not lost on Ms. Fi, she started all over again with a new readership and yes, she has taken the Wolf's advice and gone completely British in her selections.
As for you, I was able to give Tonya not much on The Notebook since you dissed it so badly. She was rather upset with me and read the thing in an hour so she could make the meeting. As for me I let you believe I read that lovely book and went back to me hammy, ice tea and nap, thank you very much.
Gabe
Copyright © 2020 All rights reserved
993
R. Linda:
I will explain meself to you as I have let this ride a very long time BECAUSE you were not happy that I asked you to read the novel The Notebook. Originally, it was the book of the month selection for Tonya's book club. She was swamped with work and didn't have time to read it, so she gave it to me and said I should, so when she went to her book club she'd know all about the story.
"And don't cheat and watch the movie!" She said leaving me to it.
At first I was ok with it, until I opened the book and had read the first two pages then I was like "OH NO! A GIRLIE BOOK. A sob story, a love story, something that probably wasn't going to end well, but in a flood of tears." I tried to tell her I didn't want to read "THIS thing, it isn't me kind of story," but she didn't care she said she needed it read.
SO I had an idea. Since I knew me attention span was going to be zip to nil, I asked YOU to read it with me, all the while you thinking I be reading away, when instead I be out in me hammock with me iced tea napping in the warm afternoon breeze.
Yes, that's right, I did that. I knew you'd not disappoint and you didn't. You lambasted me arse every chance you got asking me what kind of shite was this I wanted you to read? Was I a nutter? It was stupid, it was dumb, it wasn't YOUR kind of book.
Like I didn't know that already, duh. But wait, it gets dicier. At the same time, Fionnula (you are acquainted with our Fifi), had her own blog going where she would suggest a book and then (I think there were six interested parties) her fellow readers would read the same book and afterward there would be a discussion on it. So yeah it was a book club online for "sophisticated readers of decerning taste" I believe is how Fi put it. And it was private, still is I think.
I found out about this when I heard she had somehow roped the Wolf into joining her discussion group. Seems she thinks he's very astute, brainy, and would add that intellectual appeal that would spur on her readers to really get into discussion of politics, social issues, history, etc.
Her first read was A Clockwork Orange. A rather violent, political, and social satire of young punks in Britain. Well, it seems the Wolf whipped up on all her readers as they just didn't get it. After that Fi's book club read something not as complicated, Little Women, which bit of fluff annoyed the Wolf and he pretty much wiped the floor with Ms. Fi and suggested if she was going that route, she should switch to Jane Austen and leave the transcendentalists to Henry David Thoreau and Wadsworth. Well, to keep him in the "club" she next suggested Crime and Punishment thinking that would please the Wolf and stimulate the fluff out of her readers to something deeply serious. Lets say the Wolf found the discussion deeply DISTURBING and threatened to leave her club if she didn't regulate her readership to something in-between Dostoevsky (which gave her readers with the exception of the Wolf, a massive headache) and George Orwell (whom he knew, the devil he be, would confused the hell out her and her readership).
Starting to get panicked the Wolf would really leave her group, she suggested privately to him that War and Peace might be a colossal read (she had no clue, (nor had Wolf suggested Tolstoy)), he thought she thought he'd be impressed with the choice, however, I think he'd have slit his wrists or cut his own throat if he had to be included in a "group" discussion with five people who couldn't grasp that Leaves of Grass is not a book about mowing a lawn.
"It's a tome of unbelievable proportions." Wolf told me. "I read it in university, and she thinks its something casual. She said she was going to order the book and wondered why you can get it in three volumes. She's ordering the whole thing in one bloody book. I can't wait until she sees the tiny print. If she reads it she'll be blind when she's done."
And what he didn't say but you knew he was thinking, was "AND she'll be very confused."
He did feel bad and told her not to do it. He did tell her what it was about and she agreed her readership would be lost but first and foremost when they saw the size of the tome, she agreed too, that they'd all be reading it for years to come!
So he suggested Watershed Down a book of social economics in the guise of a warren of rabbits. And you guessed it, the readership thought it a cute faery tale about bunnies and missed the social upheaval and lessons to be learned. Wolf threw up his hands and quit.
After that, Fi said she was having trouble because her readership wanted to read things like Black Beauty and even that has a moral to the story but they all missed it! When she told Wolf what she was reduced to reading he was appalled (secretly amused), and he suggested they read George Plimpton's The Curious Case of Sid Finch.
It worked, they didn't have to put any thought to the reading of that book, just enjoy it for what it was and move on like the Wolf had done, right out the door of the book club never to be seen again, he hoped.
UNTIL it came to the reading of Fi's suggestion The Notebook. Yes, indeed by that time Fi was getting bored playing Oprah Winfrey and knew her reading of classics was not for her readership, they did better with modern era books to which the Wolf had quipped at her, "So are you up to Mark Twain now?"
Not telling him what the selection was, she pleaded with him for one more read because when he was in the club, the others sat up and listened. Now they were prone to argument over silly ideas that had nothing to do with the book they were reading.
Feeling sort of sorry for her (but not really), he said ok what is the book? And she told him. He is savvy enough to know about that book and said laughingly, "Nooo."
It was at this juncture of hearing about all this from HIM that I wanted in. That sounded just up me alley if they went back to books that were classics like Henry James, or Thomas Hardy . . . yeah count me in! But Fionnula wouldn't let me join. Even after I asked her what book she was reading for the month and she told me it was the same as Tonya's book club. I did hesitate because well really? I asked if the "readership" were all women and was told me no, 3 women, 2 men, 3 when Wolf was in. Was he in I asked? "For the present moment." Was the reply.
She knew Wolf would go nutters over that book and she didn't want me to see him publicly humiliate her and her readership, that's why she wouldn't let me in. And I badgered her like no one can because I was all for seeing the Wolf in action. I knew he was vicious, unrelenting and unforgiving when it came to literature. He has a good handle on all of that and I'd like to think I do too, but I wasn't given the chance.
It wasn't I wanted to gang up on her, it was I wanted to see Wolf take all of them on and win. And he did and that was (he thought) the last time. He quit again, but I remember thinking at the time, YOU were reading it and you would have some zingers that I could use! Yes, that's the reason why I had you read that dumb book because I knew if I got in that room with Fi, her readership and the Wolf, I'd need something to back meself up with. Yes, me sneaky purpose was twofold.
Ms. Fifi somehow got one more selection put forth before the whole thing ended. Wolfie's nemesis, Herman Melville. He went berserk over Moby Dick and who could blame him? One of his chief dislikes is when an author goes off story and pounds you hard with opinions that have little to do with the story. In this case Melville was all about the story UNTIL he went off on a tangent about whales! As you can imagine, that was it for the Wolf and he was out of there.
If one can get to see her blog, the book selection had changed to real British classics and I be told a new readership (mostly women) and there be a lot of Jane Austen and the Bronte sisters being thrown around I be sure. Seems if anything Wolf was never boring and the "readership" got into the discussion between him and Ms. Fionnula (as it seemed to have happened), and it seems it was highly entertaining. I do believe Fifi served him with a cease and desist order which was exactly what he wanted to quit the book club for good and HE DID! All was not lost on Ms. Fi, she started all over again with a new readership and yes, she has taken the Wolf's advice and gone completely British in her selections.
As for you, I was able to give Tonya not much on The Notebook since you dissed it so badly. She was rather upset with me and read the thing in an hour so she could make the meeting. As for me I let you believe I read that lovely book and went back to me hammy, ice tea and nap, thank you very much.
Gabe
Copyright © 2020 All rights reserved
5 comments:
ROFLMAO RAT BASTARD! I should have known! I was waiting for my eyes to bleed! Name a writer and I'll tell you how old I was when I read it. Austen bronte Tolkien and watership down. I read them all when I was 12. I was reading 100 books during the summer. My books now are anything by Stephen king and mysteries. You know what I like! Girly crap? HELL NO! I even started war and peace when I was 12. I got massive headaches. LMAO 1984 and big brother were a favorite. I swore I'd kick your butt all the way to Ireland if you ever asked me to read fluff again.
Uh oh LOL you matey, are about to be deep sixed. Its like poking a hornets nest savvy? Brave Cappy, LOL.
YOU REALLY HAD TO GO THERE? no one mopped the floor with me i held my own. i will send you text to prove it. oil and vinegar makes for great discussions! oh who told me that? YOU DID!
Um... sweeping the floor, wiping the floor, mopping the floor...
UH all the above Fiona!
ha ha i expected as much you are still mad at me
Post a Comment