25 October 2019
968
R. Linda:
Well, well, well! I have for years seen corn mazes and never (can you believe it?) been through one. It took a five and six-year-old to get me through me very first maze! Did I like the experience? I cannot say. At times it was boring and felt like an endurance walk, at others, it was somewhat intriguing and fun.
Recently, Tonya's brother Bruno came up with his wife and two kiddos for a visit. This of course excited all of us because we always have a good time UNLESS the Dragon be among the lot of us, but she wasn't.
Last Sunday we were going to go apple picking (because you know I can't get enough apple pies in me), some pumpkin hunting, then we were going for a hayride, and lastly, maybe the corn maze. You know ever since me story Watch Out For Dangerous Corn Mazes (11 Oct. 2011) and a certain couple's experience, I haven't exactly relished going through one. I was secretly hoping it would be ploughed down or if not, no one would remember they wanted to spend their day in a cornfield. But they did remember and the maze was prominent as you came in and well, there was no going home for coffee and apple cider doughnuts. At least not just yet.
Here is the lovely maze.
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Enter if you dare
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But first, we went apple picking and just for you I have photos of meself to post because I know you want to see if I be still sporting that muffin top!
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We were late this year hardly many apples left
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Then, we went to the pumpkin patch and as you can see from the photo I got me a really nice Pumpkin Pete.
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Me and Pete
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The wives went on the hayride with the kiddos, so I have no photos to share not being on the ride. Bruno helped get the kids on the hayride and got smeared with mud thanks to little shoes. So this be him and me looking up a dry cleaner.
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Not one close
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But then I will post photos of me in the corn maze so you know I really did wend me way through the tall corn all of the while thinking the children of the corn would pop out at me and I'd die of an apparent heart attack in a corn maze, which, when you think about it would be a fitting end to yours truly.
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Corn stalks almost reach the sky and they are thick -- that's why they are scary. Plus they sound like old bones when the wind blows
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At first, we started the maze with Bruno out front, but like his mother the Dragon Lady he was useless and it was dead ends galore to the point me feet hurt from stepping on old downed stalks and ears of hard corn. Before anyone else could complain, the five-year-old (Bruno's son) and the six-year-old (me son) shouted for us to "JUST STOP!"
"Here you guys let us lead the way," the five-year-old said, "you are takin' all the wrong turns."
And so we followed along, rolling our eyes that we may never see the light of day again because we were letting near infants take us on a tour of tall corn stalls never to be seen again. I thought that, yes I did, but they actually got us through the giant maze and out the other side. I will admit, I was looking for openings to escape at one point in our almost an hour of walking through what starts to look like the same path one walks down on every turn of the maze.
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Proof I went through a corn maze!
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Anyway, I did get some sustenance afterwards. Yup, DONUTS!
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| Ending on a yummy note |
Would I do it again? Only if someone promised me a dozen apple cider doughnuts at the end.
Gabe
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16 comments:
ROFLMAO after seeing those pictures calling you a jackass while reading the story oh yeah and flipping you off I DID have a good laugh at the story of you letting little kids leafing you out of the maze. You know why you're a jackass don't you? Pictures of your back? REALLY? and one with your head missing
It's a good thing I love your stories because I would send you a special apple! A snow white special!
LOL I knew that would get you.
Hey, nice sky in that first photo and that maze looks HUGE. Enjoyed the story and really laughed at the dry cleaning photo, that was funny. Oh and Gabe? You haven't changed a bit, LMAO
next time turn around. you should weigh a ton with all the donuts you consume!
Ha, ha I don’t.
You look pretty good there Gabe. Back or not. Lol.
If only me muse shared your opinion — sigh.
I do share the opinion BUT I just erased my original snarky response. It sounded TOO much like wicked witch. Talked about donut top.
There be NO doughnut top. Not yet anyway, only happens when someone (who knows who they are) sends vast amounts of fudge.
I have ever been through a corn maze. Do we even have them here? I give you props to let small lads take the lead. You could have navigated on your phone I should think, but more fun for the wee ones. Sounds fun actually.
Now I have to go to a corn maze and try this. I've done the boxwood mazes in the UK but never corn. I'd think corn, because you can see through the branches, a lot easier than boxwood. Of course there were no doughnuts at the end.
Oh you haven't lived Wolfie, put that right on your bucket list of to dos. Being not a techie person I never thought about navigation by phone, but if it ever happens again I might just employ that idea.
Corn maze - an adventure in "Everything looks the same." Boxwood - Too close to The Shining experience for moi.
Didn't you EVER see the movie children of the corn. The corn maze is the perfect setting! When we move fudge for you !
I have seen it and now who’s being a smartyarse?
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