07 February, 2019

A Nonsense Way To Remember

07 February 2019
943

R. Linda:

Living in the rural sticks, the woods, boondocks, the boonies, out the way place, far off the beaten path, isolated, remote, secluded, and finally the middle of nowhere, we have a lot of birds. Yes, birds! And trees, lots and lots of trees. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees because you are standing in the middle of it. Yup, that place, New Hampshire. So, it was not unusual that the kiddos bring school work home that has to do with the state of the union they live in. Last week, the middle child, Guido, had to identify certain kinds of birds that flourish in New Hampshire. This he did quite well, so well in fact on Monday he was given the assignment to identify the groups of birds when in a "flock" as we can in error say, as they are not sheep. A park ranger was coming with an assortment of raptures to give a talk to the children and teacher thought a few of her brightest and best students should show off their birdie knowledge to the ranger. Well, Guido was chosen as one of these. Problem was Guido was stumped and scratching his head in wonder because he didn't know that each species of birds have a name when they are collected together in their own individual grouping.

I had the list of the groupings and helped him, but he could not remember them, which he was supposed to recite out loud in front of a State Forest Ranger, much to his chagrin. Here's the list:

Parliament of owls
A rafter of turkeys
A murder of crows
A muster of peacocks
A cast of hawks
A dance of cranes
A cluster of knots
A conclave of cardinals
A conspiracy of ravens
A fall of woodcocks
A murmuration of starlings
A watch of nightingale
A banditry of chickadees
A tiding of magpies
A mob of emus
A committee of vultures
A brood of hens
A flush of mallards
A congregation of plovers
A descent of woodpeckers
A flight of swallows
A gaggle of geese
A party of jays
A bevy of quail
A bouquet of pheasants
A cover of coots
Deceit of lapwings
A host of sparrows
Pitying turtledoves
A raft of ducks
A trip of dotterels
A colony of penguins
A company of parrots
A mewing of catbirds

After much frustration and cursing, yes cursing, the child tried to say those words under his breath, but I could hear him having excellent hearing meself. Finally, I found meself becoming frustrated with the list and remembering how I memorised things like lists when I was a tyke in school, I put it in story form and lo and behold, he got it. Of course he can only remember the groupings by telling the story, so this should be good. Here be what I came up with:


While the owls sat in parliament, a conclave of cardinals met in the court next door, watching the turkeys fill the rafter while the knots arrived in a cluster. Discussion was a murder of crows with a muster of peacocks in attendance as witnesses. A cast of hawks thought it was a conspiracy of ravens who were responsible and screamed at the committee of vultures their accusation. That accusation caused the mallards to flush and brought a descent of woodpeckers to the podium, which in turn caused the catbirds to mew from the balcony, and that brought a fall of woodcocks to the gallery in disbelief.  A murmuration of starlings argued the events among themselves, but the watch of nightingales clued the tidings to the magpies who in turn upset a brood of hens sitting in jury. The screeching continued as a congregation of plovers formed causing the flight of swallows soaring into a gaggle of geese which set a party of jays scattering among a bevy of quail. This upset the bouquet of pheasants causing the coots to cover in the corner. In the end it was the deceit of lapwings and the banditry of chickadees that caused the trouble. The emus became a mob at the door, leading the cranes to dance with excitement. At the close of session, a host of sparrows and pitying turtledoves sent a raft of ducks to trip the dotterels, leaving a colony of penguins in the company of parrots!

Gabe
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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is clever. Well done.

mobit22 said...

LMAO I couldn't have thought of that story in a million years.

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

I know, only me right?

mobit22 said...

Ive always been interested in the names of groups of all animals not just birds. What you can do for me is write a story about a pride of lions and herds of other animals. LMAO

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

That might throw me. Not very educated in the big cat department.

Dew said...

Talk about tongue twister! What a brilliant iidea to help
Your son remember. Good Da you are

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

I try