18 January 2013
623
R. Linda:
As you probably know, the UK has had a lot of snow this winter and well, the white stuff when accumulating in great amounts, sets one to becoming somewhat bored with it all. How many times can you enjoy clearing your driveway of the white stuff before you want to tear your hair out? I mean there has to be some fun out of all this snow. Ah, the idea springs to mind, that a good old-fashioned snowball fight might do the trick. Yes, that's the ticket!
So you call your bored neighbours and challenge them to a snow-smashing wonder fest. They are as bored as you and all agree that rules should be made and sides picked! The easiest way to do this is to have one side of the street lob snowballs at the other side. All get 30 minutes to get out there, make a fort of sorts between sidewalk and curb, and then in intense earnest, start making snowballs.
Once this is all set the signal is given, and the lobbing commences until one side cries, UNCLE! Or, runs out of snowballs in which they are overtaken by the other side and voila! Bob's your uncle one side gets to crow about their win for the rest of the winter.
Now this all happened, yes it did, but the losing side soon got bored with being losers so they challenged the other side of the street to a re-match. Well, the other side lost and they couldn't take the indoor loser thing either, and re-challenged the losers now winners to another lob fest. This went on for a few weeks it did and it turned violent. Yes, can you imagine a snowball fight turning dangerous? This one did.
As the bantering became taunting, one group in the middle of the block got some water and as they finished making their snowballs, they poured the water slowly over them to ice them into hard balls. Yes, they did! Did you know when hit with an ice ball it hurts? Oh yeah, it does. Not to be outdone, outplayed, outwitted, the other side on the next challenge, put small stones in the snowballs. Oh yes, they did and they lobbed them not a thought in their revengeful head what rock-filled snowballs might do when connecting with front teeth.
So as it is half the neighbourhood has lost their teeth from the rather ingenious rock snowballs, and the other half, their hearing from the ice balls. You would think that enough be enough BUT NO. This . . . this . . . whatever you want to call it, expanded. So intense were both sides in injuring the other, that the occasional slip-sliding motorist who had the unfortunate timing of driving down the street while THIS was going on, found themselves with broken windscreens, dented car bodies and headlights gone!
As you can imagine, THIS brought many a complaint to the local men in blue it did. And they came out thinking it was a joke, but they soon found as they came down the street in their new police car, that THIS was no joke. Someone not realising (because they had got an ice ball to the spectacles which broke and left them pretty sightless) the vehicle slowly traversing the road was not any ordinary vehicle (and as you might have guessed), this unsuspecting rock snowball-throwing person, lobbed his snowball at the motor breaking the long flashing red light on top of the car. Yee-ah.
Everyone scattered on both sides of the street. The police car was stopped in its tracks, the officers out and looking around for WHO DID IT, but that person had blundered their way inside and out of sight. Well, nothing to do about it right? No, there was something to be done and it was DONE, DONE, DONE!
An announcement was made by loudspeaker as the police cruiser with its broken light advanced from street to street. The stern voice coming from the speaker meant business, yes it did. It said loud and clear: "Newington-On-Matting (fictitious name to protect the not-so-innocent) is terribly aware that the weather has been conducive to the public taking to recreational sport such as snowball throwing. This should be fun, but it has been brought to our attention that the dentists in our area can't handle the influx of new denture-seeking patients. As well as hearing specialists complaining they are being harassed for hearing aids being delivered quicker so the snowball throwers can get "back out there." Therefore, IF anyone of you is caught throwing a rock filled snowball or an ice ball at moving vehicles, or at houses, or at each other, YOU will be arrested and charged with malicious riot! Likewise, if anyone throws a rock filled snowball or ice ball at people who DO NOT want to be involved in such horseplay, they could be arrested and the charge will be classed as anti-social behaviour."
Yes, it is once again the law sucking the fun out of winter play.
At this time no arrests have been made. I would suppose the big kids are behaving themselves. One hopes that once fitted with their new teeth and hearing devices the winter games will not begin again. You do realise this "lull in play" gives them time to think of new ways of enjoying the winter fun. Yup, could interfere greatly with one's shovelling I'd say. So be glad you don't live in the UK because I think once this gets out, there will be snowball contests throughout. Me own kiddos thought it was a great idea when they overheard me telling Tonya this very story. Me own little darlings thought the idea of rock hard ice balls masquerading as snowballs was ingenious!
Hum.
R. Linda:
As you probably know, the UK has had a lot of snow this winter and well, the white stuff when accumulating in great amounts, sets one to becoming somewhat bored with it all. How many times can you enjoy clearing your driveway of the white stuff before you want to tear your hair out? I mean there has to be some fun out of all this snow. Ah, the idea springs to mind, that a good old-fashioned snowball fight might do the trick. Yes, that's the ticket!
 |
| Nothing more fun to do with the neighbours than THIS! |
Once this is all set the signal is given, and the lobbing commences until one side cries, UNCLE! Or, runs out of snowballs in which they are overtaken by the other side and voila! Bob's your uncle one side gets to crow about their win for the rest of the winter.
Now this all happened, yes it did, but the losing side soon got bored with being losers so they challenged the other side of the street to a re-match. Well, the other side lost and they couldn't take the indoor loser thing either, and re-challenged the losers now winners to another lob fest. This went on for a few weeks it did and it turned violent. Yes, can you imagine a snowball fight turning dangerous? This one did.
As the bantering became taunting, one group in the middle of the block got some water and as they finished making their snowballs, they poured the water slowly over them to ice them into hard balls. Yes, they did! Did you know when hit with an ice ball it hurts? Oh yeah, it does. Not to be outdone, outplayed, outwitted, the other side on the next challenge, put small stones in the snowballs. Oh yes, they did and they lobbed them not a thought in their revengeful head what rock-filled snowballs might do when connecting with front teeth.
So as it is half the neighbourhood has lost their teeth from the rather ingenious rock snowballs, and the other half, their hearing from the ice balls. You would think that enough be enough BUT NO. This . . . this . . . whatever you want to call it, expanded. So intense were both sides in injuring the other, that the occasional slip-sliding motorist who had the unfortunate timing of driving down the street while THIS was going on, found themselves with broken windscreens, dented car bodies and headlights gone!
As you can imagine, THIS brought many a complaint to the local men in blue it did. And they came out thinking it was a joke, but they soon found as they came down the street in their new police car, that THIS was no joke. Someone not realising (because they had got an ice ball to the spectacles which broke and left them pretty sightless) the vehicle slowly traversing the road was not any ordinary vehicle (and as you might have guessed), this unsuspecting rock snowball-throwing person, lobbed his snowball at the motor breaking the long flashing red light on top of the car. Yee-ah.
Everyone scattered on both sides of the street. The police car was stopped in its tracks, the officers out and looking around for WHO DID IT, but that person had blundered their way inside and out of sight. Well, nothing to do about it right? No, there was something to be done and it was DONE, DONE, DONE!
An announcement was made by loudspeaker as the police cruiser with its broken light advanced from street to street. The stern voice coming from the speaker meant business, yes it did. It said loud and clear: "Newington-On-Matting (fictitious name to protect the not-so-innocent) is terribly aware that the weather has been conducive to the public taking to recreational sport such as snowball throwing. This should be fun, but it has been brought to our attention that the dentists in our area can't handle the influx of new denture-seeking patients. As well as hearing specialists complaining they are being harassed for hearing aids being delivered quicker so the snowball throwers can get "back out there." Therefore, IF anyone of you is caught throwing a rock filled snowball or an ice ball at moving vehicles, or at houses, or at each other, YOU will be arrested and charged with malicious riot! Likewise, if anyone throws a rock filled snowball or ice ball at people who DO NOT want to be involved in such horseplay, they could be arrested and the charge will be classed as anti-social behaviour."
Yes, it is once again the law sucking the fun out of winter play.
At this time no arrests have been made. I would suppose the big kids are behaving themselves. One hopes that once fitted with their new teeth and hearing devices the winter games will not begin again. You do realise this "lull in play" gives them time to think of new ways of enjoying the winter fun. Yup, could interfere greatly with one's shovelling I'd say. So be glad you don't live in the UK because I think once this gets out, there will be snowball contests throughout. Me own kiddos thought it was a great idea when they overheard me telling Tonya this very story. Me own little darlings thought the idea of rock hard ice balls masquerading as snowballs was ingenious!
| Yeah right they are making a snowman - somehow I think they have a massive cache of snowballs |
Gabe
Copyright © 2013 All rights reserved
4 comments:
LOL
just fun in the snow! NOT
I HAVE been hit with an iceball. it hurt and left a husky bruise!
dis iz a goodly story Gabby! I liked it an will be arrivin at yer house fer a go round of icey balls. Mahahawaahahaaaaaa
You best not.
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