354
R. Linda:
Yesterday around 11 a.m. I had me break I did. I decided to go to Starbucks and get me a cup of coffee, but before I took off I did stop and ask Mark if he wanted anything while I was out. He said he'd love a regular Dunks hot Turbo coffee. I thought to meself, what the heck, I can swing by there it is only a block from the Starbucks place.
So off I took meself and went to Starbucks first. I thought why not? I be out in snowy rainy Boston, I need to warm up. So I pull up and get a cheery, "Welcome to Starbucks, how can I help you today?" I say I want a hot coffee venti, black. She comes back and says, "We've got the new trenta size if you'd like to try one, it's a limited offer we won't have them officially until May."
"What's a trenta?" I ask.
"The new trenta is 30 ounces of coffee (she giggles), but is really 31 instead of the 24 ounce venti. AND, the good part is it is only 50 cents more."
WELL FILL ME UP!
I didn't say that, I did say, "Shure, I'll try that!" with enthusiasm.
"I can only give you it iced, we don't have the hot cups."
"Iced it is," I said not caring, coffee was coffee iced or hot.
So up I pull and I pay her as she tells me that me coffee will be right up. I clear out me cupholder and as I turn to take me change, she hands me this bucket. Yes, R. Linda it was a bucket of coffee. It was so big I couldn't fit it in me cupholder thingee. I had to put it on me lap as I drove. I was thinking I could bring me own bucket the next time for a refill and probably me old neighbour's cow for the cream. I could be driving around like that enjoying me bucket of coffee I could.
I pulled into Dunks and ordered Mark's Turbo. I pull up and the girl slides the window open and starts to ask for me money when she spies me bucket of coffee.
"HOLY SHIT! What is that?" She says leaning out the window.
I heaved up me bucket from Starbucks and she looks at it agape, her eyes about bugging from her head when she sighs a "Wowww."
I knew right then she had the right job, she was a fellow coffee lover. I put me bucket of joe back down because to hold it up was putting a strain on me forearm muscles, it was that heavy.
"Is that the new size?"
"Em yes it is."
"How much does that hold?" She asked me quite interested.
"I think 34 gallons," says I laughing.
"Sheeeit! That much, huh?"
She gave me my change and handed me the Turbo. R. Linda, it paled by comparison. It looked like a mini-coffee it did.
I drove back to the office and had a hell of a time getting up the stairs (the elevator was broken). I had to trudge 6 stories to me office heaving me bucket of Starbucks. They really should put pail handles on the cup for easy carting. When Mark saw it he was quite impressed as was the whole office. They all wanted to go get a bucket of coffee too.
It took me from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. to drink it all. I savoured every sip and if I had time, I would have stopped on me way home from work for another, but I was late, so I resisted the temptation.
I got all my work done at work so had nothing to do at home. I usually end up taking me work home to finish up, but this is the first time I seemed to fly through it. I helped Tonya with dinner, did the dishes, did six loads of laundry for her and ironed me shirts, something I never do. I even gave both boyos a bath and put them to bed.
I can't understand why it is I am not sleepy after doing all that work. The kiddies went to bed around eight and Tonya at 11:30 (after the news). I went too, but couldn't seem to sleep. So I got up and cleaned the kitchen and even mopped the floor. By 1:30 I had painted the bathroom downstairs and cleaned out two closets. At 2:30 I put all my books in alphabetical order. Still not tired, around 3 a.m. I decided to go out and shovel me neighbour's driveway. I shoveled it twice. It be the size of a football field, but it's clear. About 5:30 I was thinking I really needed to get to bed, but I wasn't at all sleepy. So I read War and Peace and finished it by 7:30 a.m. I took a shower, made breakfast for everyone and then left for work.
On the way I stopped at Starbucks for another bucket of coffee to get me through the day because I was starting to feel sleepy FINALLY. It's 10:20 a.m. and I be not sure how it is I be functioning without any sleep. I don't feel sleepy at all AGAIN. I don't understand this. What am I doing wrong?
Gabe
Copyright © 2011 All rights reserved
R. Linda:
Yesterday around 11 a.m. I had me break I did. I decided to go to Starbucks and get me a cup of coffee, but before I took off I did stop and ask Mark if he wanted anything while I was out. He said he'd love a regular Dunks hot Turbo coffee. I thought to meself, what the heck, I can swing by there it is only a block from the Starbucks place.
So off I took meself and went to Starbucks first. I thought why not? I be out in snowy rainy Boston, I need to warm up. So I pull up and get a cheery, "Welcome to Starbucks, how can I help you today?" I say I want a hot coffee venti, black. She comes back and says, "We've got the new trenta size if you'd like to try one, it's a limited offer we won't have them officially until May."
"What's a trenta?" I ask.
"The new trenta is 30 ounces of coffee (she giggles), but is really 31 instead of the 24 ounce venti. AND, the good part is it is only 50 cents more."
WELL FILL ME UP!
I didn't say that, I did say, "Shure, I'll try that!" with enthusiasm.
"I can only give you it iced, we don't have the hot cups."
"Iced it is," I said not caring, coffee was coffee iced or hot.
So up I pull and I pay her as she tells me that me coffee will be right up. I clear out me cupholder and as I turn to take me change, she hands me this bucket. Yes, R. Linda it was a bucket of coffee. It was so big I couldn't fit it in me cupholder thingee. I had to put it on me lap as I drove. I was thinking I could bring me own bucket the next time for a refill and probably me old neighbour's cow for the cream. I could be driving around like that enjoying me bucket of coffee I could.
I pulled into Dunks and ordered Mark's Turbo. I pull up and the girl slides the window open and starts to ask for me money when she spies me bucket of coffee.
"HOLY SHIT! What is that?" She says leaning out the window.
I heaved up me bucket from Starbucks and she looks at it agape, her eyes about bugging from her head when she sighs a "Wowww."
I knew right then she had the right job, she was a fellow coffee lover. I put me bucket of joe back down because to hold it up was putting a strain on me forearm muscles, it was that heavy.
"Is that the new size?"
"Em yes it is."
"How much does that hold?" She asked me quite interested.
"I think 34 gallons," says I laughing.
"Sheeeit! That much, huh?"
She gave me my change and handed me the Turbo. R. Linda, it paled by comparison. It looked like a mini-coffee it did.
I drove back to the office and had a hell of a time getting up the stairs (the elevator was broken). I had to trudge 6 stories to me office heaving me bucket of Starbucks. They really should put pail handles on the cup for easy carting. When Mark saw it he was quite impressed as was the whole office. They all wanted to go get a bucket of coffee too.
It took me from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. to drink it all. I savoured every sip and if I had time, I would have stopped on me way home from work for another, but I was late, so I resisted the temptation.
I got all my work done at work so had nothing to do at home. I usually end up taking me work home to finish up, but this is the first time I seemed to fly through it. I helped Tonya with dinner, did the dishes, did six loads of laundry for her and ironed me shirts, something I never do. I even gave both boyos a bath and put them to bed.
I can't understand why it is I am not sleepy after doing all that work. The kiddies went to bed around eight and Tonya at 11:30 (after the news). I went too, but couldn't seem to sleep. So I got up and cleaned the kitchen and even mopped the floor. By 1:30 I had painted the bathroom downstairs and cleaned out two closets. At 2:30 I put all my books in alphabetical order. Still not tired, around 3 a.m. I decided to go out and shovel me neighbour's driveway. I shoveled it twice. It be the size of a football field, but it's clear. About 5:30 I was thinking I really needed to get to bed, but I wasn't at all sleepy. So I read War and Peace and finished it by 7:30 a.m. I took a shower, made breakfast for everyone and then left for work.
On the way I stopped at Starbucks for another bucket of coffee to get me through the day because I was starting to feel sleepy FINALLY. It's 10:20 a.m. and I be not sure how it is I be functioning without any sleep. I don't feel sleepy at all AGAIN. I don't understand this. What am I doing wrong?
Gabe
Copyright © 2011 All rights reserved
1 comment:
Glug, glug, glug, drowning by coffee - ya think?
Post a Comment