21 November, 2009

Me Goth apartment

21 June 2004
63

R. Linda:

How dark is me apartment? Dark enough the dirt won't show for sure. Thank you for the advice about washing the tub out to make sure it's clean. That me me feel really goooddd. Makes me wonder what else lives with me. I be thinking the dark slimy bug variety.

Oh, and nice of the owner to leave me messages in Russian! I don't speak it, so I have not a clue what they say. I be going to buy a book on the Russian language.

Ever onward and upward! I bought some 60-watt light bulbs and have put them in every single socket I could get me hands on. The place still hasn't brightened much. Everything is done in old dried blood red. If it isn't flocked wallpaper it is some kind of paint with sand in it. I joked about Russian Cossack clothing with Tonya and don't you know there is a fur hat, cossack shirt and sash in a glassed framed picture in the hallway? If I get the urge to go native, I can dress the part.

There are all kinds of Russian knickknacks. There are these Faberge eggs all over the place. I know they are supposed to be priceless, but I sit there among them and think Easter has come early! There is one on the desk in the office room, a replica of the Kremlin sits on the corner and books on Anastasia and her ill-fated family. I be dumped in gloom I tell ya.

I see there is a gas fireplace that if one turns it on would make for a cozy atmosphere, but not in this place. I almost feel like Rasputin will be walking in, dressed in a bear-skinned coat, with long hair sporting snowflakes as he slams his fists on the desk and demands to know who the hell I am.

This place is not for the faint-hearted and I would love to see what Alison's relative looks like. I know it is female, but I am of the mind it is a male-type female. Everything is mannish and cumbersome. Ah ha! A heavyset male type female.

There are no stuffed animals like Ali has, and there are no perfume bottles in the water closet, there is vodka galore though, all Russian brands and just reading the proof label will make you cross-eyed. I may indulge if the shadows in here start moving toward me. Oh hell, just call me Taras Bulba!

I need to get out here for a few hours, maybe go buy some garlic bulbs for hanging around me neck. This place is creepy. How creepy is creepy? I gave meself a start upon rising this morning. I didn't know there was a smoke and gold mirror in the hallway and nearly had a heart attack upon passing meself on the way to the water closet. Took me a good twenty minutes to realise I was alone.

Gabe
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