30 September 2013
711
R. Linda:
How is it then, you go out and buy a talking parrot, bring it home, it seems to like its new place, and then suddenly it throws a tirade of abuse in your direction? What do you do? Do you open a window and hope it flies out? Do you wave a broom at it to threaten it? Or, do you stand in front of it and curse it curse for curse?
Well, a lovely couple in Bristol, England, had this very conundrum. It seemed, for unknown reasons, they desired to own an African Grey Parrot. They found one named Basil of all names (that should have told them something straight off) that formerly resided in the Vale of Glamorgan, Wales, just across the water from Bristol! So off they go, they like what they see, and home to Bristol goes Basil.
The previous owners did mention that Basil knew a few curse words, only a few, but he was well behaved he was and such a pretty boy too! They were sure he'd settled down nicely in his new home. Well, one would hope, wouldn't one? First up was the wife one Sarah, who, upon saying hello to her new addition, was taken aback when Basil told her to "F*ck off!" in a Welsh accent, no less. I'm sure Sarah stood there blinking for a moment, not sure she heard right, but oh yes she heard right she did.
As she took a step back, her brow furrowed in consternation, birdie Basil let it rip with a string of foul language that was more than just a "few" curse words, "arsehole" and "bastard" being at the top of his impressive list! Was he showing off his "stuff"? You betcha! That bird had a command of English curse words to rival . . . Michael McIntyre, albeit with a Welsh accent, but all the same, he knew how to swear like a pirate and accent or no, he was clearly understood.
No, no, the change of venue did nothing but enhance Basil's vocabulary. What to do? Somehow, while Basil's cage was being cleaned, the potty mouth parrot made his escape through an open window. Now, if it was me wife, I would be suspicious the window wasn't left open accidentally on purpose, but that's not the case here -- the new owners said. If the bird was mine, I'd be closing that window and sitting down to me paper and tea like I never owned a swearing parrot, nor had ever seen one in me life I would. But well, the softhearted new owners had only been subject to Basil's abuse for a short four days, so off they went looking for the cursing escapee.
They even went as far as to put up posters of his bad self until three days later, they found him at a veterinarian's. The staff there said he was given over by a person who probably was just as amazed as his new owners when Basil called him names (which we will leave to your imagination) and, in his amazement, speedily took Basil to a local clinic to unload him. Once there, the staff said, right off, birdie Basil introduced them to his illustrious use of words. Mandy Stone, the manager, said, "He kept calling the nurses tossers, and there were a few other phrases he used that I won't repeat. It was quite shocking. He was very quiet and shy for the first day, but then, all of a sudden, he started talking and rather surprised us with his adult vocabulary. He also whistled the McDonald's tune, and he danced for us when we asked him to, so we forgave his bad manners."
Sounds familiar to me; when Guido started that testing phase of learning curse words in pre-school and came home to try them out, we were quite a bit amazed ourselves. When something didn't go his way, he stood right up and called his mother and meself, "bleedin' wankers." We did react, but he came back from his delegated "think about your language mister" room and danced the Pugwash tune and made us laugh and all was forgiven.
Anyway, Sarah was beet red at hearing this. Yes, how embarrassing is that? I ask ya! She told the staff "sorry" and took Basil home she did. She surmised that when left on his own for three days without human contact, Basil gets quite a bit angry. Thus, I be surmising the language gets quite a bit more colourful as a result. I am sure Basil has recuperated beautifully after his ordeal. I'm not so sure about his new owners, and I be reasonably certain the staff at the veterinary clinic haven't forgotten Mr. Potty Mouth.
When I told our Captain Jaack of this, thinking it was an amusing little tidbit of a story, his reaction quite stunned me when he asked, "Is the bird for sale?"
For the sake of your ears and integrity, I post this picture as a warning. DO NOT buy an African Grey Parrot! They are exceptionally quick learners, and accent or not, they pick up curse words, in particular with the ease of the Oracle skimming past team New Zealand on a windy day.
Gabe
Copyright © 2013 All rights reserved
R. Linda:
How is it then, you go out and buy a talking parrot, bring it home, it seems to like its new place, and then suddenly it throws a tirade of abuse in your direction? What do you do? Do you open a window and hope it flies out? Do you wave a broom at it to threaten it? Or, do you stand in front of it and curse it curse for curse?
Well, a lovely couple in Bristol, England, had this very conundrum. It seemed, for unknown reasons, they desired to own an African Grey Parrot. They found one named Basil of all names (that should have told them something straight off) that formerly resided in the Vale of Glamorgan, Wales, just across the water from Bristol! So off they go, they like what they see, and home to Bristol goes Basil.
The previous owners did mention that Basil knew a few curse words, only a few, but he was well behaved he was and such a pretty boy too! They were sure he'd settled down nicely in his new home. Well, one would hope, wouldn't one? First up was the wife one Sarah, who, upon saying hello to her new addition, was taken aback when Basil told her to "F*ck off!" in a Welsh accent, no less. I'm sure Sarah stood there blinking for a moment, not sure she heard right, but oh yes she heard right she did.
As she took a step back, her brow furrowed in consternation, birdie Basil let it rip with a string of foul language that was more than just a "few" curse words, "arsehole" and "bastard" being at the top of his impressive list! Was he showing off his "stuff"? You betcha! That bird had a command of English curse words to rival . . . Michael McIntyre, albeit with a Welsh accent, but all the same, he knew how to swear like a pirate and accent or no, he was clearly understood.
No, no, the change of venue did nothing but enhance Basil's vocabulary. What to do? Somehow, while Basil's cage was being cleaned, the potty mouth parrot made his escape through an open window. Now, if it was me wife, I would be suspicious the window wasn't left open accidentally on purpose, but that's not the case here -- the new owners said. If the bird was mine, I'd be closing that window and sitting down to me paper and tea like I never owned a swearing parrot, nor had ever seen one in me life I would. But well, the softhearted new owners had only been subject to Basil's abuse for a short four days, so off they went looking for the cursing escapee.
They even went as far as to put up posters of his bad self until three days later, they found him at a veterinarian's. The staff there said he was given over by a person who probably was just as amazed as his new owners when Basil called him names (which we will leave to your imagination) and, in his amazement, speedily took Basil to a local clinic to unload him. Once there, the staff said, right off, birdie Basil introduced them to his illustrious use of words. Mandy Stone, the manager, said, "He kept calling the nurses tossers, and there were a few other phrases he used that I won't repeat. It was quite shocking. He was very quiet and shy for the first day, but then, all of a sudden, he started talking and rather surprised us with his adult vocabulary. He also whistled the McDonald's tune, and he danced for us when we asked him to, so we forgave his bad manners."
Sounds familiar to me; when Guido started that testing phase of learning curse words in pre-school and came home to try them out, we were quite a bit amazed ourselves. When something didn't go his way, he stood right up and called his mother and meself, "bleedin' wankers." We did react, but he came back from his delegated "think about your language mister" room and danced the Pugwash tune and made us laugh and all was forgiven.
Anyway, Sarah was beet red at hearing this. Yes, how embarrassing is that? I ask ya! She told the staff "sorry" and took Basil home she did. She surmised that when left on his own for three days without human contact, Basil gets quite a bit angry. Thus, I be surmising the language gets quite a bit more colourful as a result. I am sure Basil has recuperated beautifully after his ordeal. I'm not so sure about his new owners, and I be reasonably certain the staff at the veterinary clinic haven't forgotten Mr. Potty Mouth.
When I told our Captain Jaack of this, thinking it was an amusing little tidbit of a story, his reaction quite stunned me when he asked, "Is the bird for sale?"
For the sake of your ears and integrity, I post this picture as a warning. DO NOT buy an African Grey Parrot! They are exceptionally quick learners, and accent or not, they pick up curse words, in particular with the ease of the Oracle skimming past team New Zealand on a windy day.
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| Looks are deceiving |
Copyright © 2013 All rights reserved
