Showing posts with label Literally left in the lurch. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Literally left in the lurch. Show all posts

19 January, 2022

HEY! Where ye goin'?!

18 January 2022

1057

R. Linda:

Monday we had 8.8" of fluffy white stuff that was followed by 2 hours of sleet, and following that 2.3" of rain. The light fluffy snow was reduced to 5" of heavy slushy stuff. Everyone was off since it was MLK Day so we were a houseful of stuck inside, bored out of our skulls kind of family.

The wee one was screaming he wanted to go outside and build a snowman, and that was quite impossible since there wasn't snow to make one, just hard icy slush. He was wailing his head off while the other two boyos were wrestling in the living room, with their mother yelling over the screaming wee one for the two to "Stop it right now!"

I had a headache and it wasn't even 9 a.m.

I ended up with more than a headache when Mam informed me she needed a few things from the grocery store to make dinner later. And she needed to get them now because she had to marinate the roast for a few hours. Looking out the window at the pounding rain, I reluctantly offered to go get the supplies.

"Nooo, nooo," she said, "I hafta gooe, I know where everyting be now." 

Tonya was shaking her head at me, that no way was me little apple-cheeked Mam with dimples driving anywhere in the mess outside. So I offered to drive her.

I warmed the car up and she was all bundled but I wasn't. I figured she felt the cold more than I did, so in my light jacket, driving gloves and Ireland First hat we took off. The country roads were icy so I took it slow because a couple of times we started to slide down an embankment that had a wall of trees to stop a descent. Most of the drive was downhill because we live in the foothills of a mountain range, so was slow going, to say the least.

The highway was not too bad, but again it was a dicey ride. More than a few vehicles did complete spins in front of us. It did amaze me that the idiots driving behind some of the spinouts would speed up to pass the spinning vehicle and think they'd make it by without getting clipped. Out of three of these harrowing spinouts, two morons got clipped and they all spun to the shoulder and off into the embankments. It amazes me how stupid people can be.

Anyway, we got safely to the Market Bucket as Mam refers to the supermarket. She got what she needed and then it was the great trek back through the slush and ice.

I got us safely off the highway and onto our narrow backroads. We were one road from my house when me car decided the incline was too much and it started to slide us almost sideways. I stopped and slowly started forward but we slid again precariously close to the culvert. I tried again and got the car somewhat straight while thanking the powers that be that no one else was on the road but us.

I started forward again, but the tyres spun. I tried five times and got nowhere but on the fifth try started to slide backwards!

"You git oot and poosh," Mam instructed, "an I will git us goin'."

We got into an Irish argy bargy on that one, I was all for trying again, but she insisted the only way was for me to push and she'd get down the road a small way and then we could be on our way once I popped back in. 

I got out and slip-slided my way to the boot of the car and with much effort I pushed and pushed and the tyres spun, and I pushed harder and suddenly the damn car bucked off with me falling to one knee to break the fall. By this time the ice was coming down in buckets, stinging my face, me gloves soaked and freezing me hands where I had gripped the slushy boot to push. My light jacket was doing nothing but letting the chill in big time. I stood for a moment looking at the ground and how I could slip-slide me way to the waiting car, but there was no waiting car!

The old woman had got it going and she and her groceries were on their way home, sans ME! I had leather-soled shoes on, so it was a dangerous walk or more appropriately, slide home AND it was all UPHILL to boot!

20 minutes later (and many falls to report), I got home covered in a sheet of ice, icicles hanging off me nose and ruined hat. The wee one saw me first and pointed and laughed (oh yes he did), telling everyone he got an iceman instead of a snowman!

Tonya came running over, divested me of me ice wear and put me in front of the fire, telling me I was soaked through and should really jump in a warm shower. Mam I could see, was in the kitchen making her marinade like there was nothing wrong with her son being a human ice cube, I tell ya!!!

I can tell ya this much, that be the last time old Gabriel drives anywhere in slushy icy weather with his Mam. She's grounded. 

It took me all day to warm up it did. I be still feeling the chill in me legs and this is what? Wednesday? Oh and you'd want to know how dinner turned out I be sure, well, it turned out well and did warm me insides up, but did nothing for my outer extremities. I shake like a maraca, me teeth making the sound of one, and I can barely get up without creaking like I'm 80. Burrr!!!

Gabe

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