Story #210
R. Linda:
I went to the dentist's office this morning. I walked in, smiled me no cavities grandest smile, and sat down to wait me turn. The receptionist came out and ushered me in at no time at all. I sat down, and they asked me how I'd been. Of course, I didn't tell the horror stories of life in a flood plane, nor about the Weasil parties, nor about the raincoat-wearing/flashing neighbour, nor about the mailbox-stealing beavers, or how me road was washed away forever, nor about the hired help with the chain saw, no none of that did I mention. Instead, "Life is great!" I declared through me pearly whites.
The dentist told me to open wide, poked around, and said, "Gabe, as usual, there is no cavity in sight. Keep up what you're doing; your teeth look great!"
He buzzed in his associate and said, "Take a look at this clean, well-kept mouth, Dr. Abbron." And sure enough, I have another set of hands poking around in me mouth and a lot of glowing sounds and nods of approval, and he says to his nurse, "Kathy, come take a look at this; this is what a healthy mouth looks like." Well, they all took a turn, all six of them and me ego was very tall indeed, it was.
One of the dental assistants says to me in an embarrassed way, "You know, I thought all people in the UK had yellow, rotten teeth."
Ah, how nice, I think to meself, but I say, "I be from Ireland; we eat plenty of iron-rich potatoes, so our teeth are white and strong. But the English, well, they drink large amounts of tea, and it stains their teeth. It does; that's why they look so bloody awful." I be proud not to be an Englishman at moments like these.
The hygienist came in, took a peek at me fine set of choppers, and said, "Gabriel, all our patients should have mouths like yours." Then she polished the choppers to a blinding shine.
Before I left, they were all wearing sunglasses and waving goodbye; it was that grand a check-up.
I was driving down the highway, and as I pulled up to the red light, the women in the car beside me looked over. I smiled, and they grabbed each other's arms in excitement. They smiled back, talked to each other, pointed to their teeth and then to mine, and nodded that my choppers were beautiful.
I pulled away, passed a few cars and came to the next red light, and the same thing happened. The woman in the car next to me looked over, I smiled, and she put on her sunglasses and nodded and smiled, pointing at me bright white choppers and mouthing at me, "Lovely."
I made sure I hit every red light on the way home. That boosted the old ego, so many admiring me choppers in so little time. Sigh.
When I got home, I was very thirsty from all that smiling I did. So as not to get the choppers full of sugar, I sipped a Coke A Cola through a straw. We can't damage the enamel with sugar now, can we? The only thing I was sad about was that I didn't take stock in the sunglasses trade. I could have made a small fortune driving home.
Gabe
Copyright © 2007 All rights reserved
R. Linda:
I went to the dentist's office this morning. I walked in, smiled me no cavities grandest smile, and sat down to wait me turn. The receptionist came out and ushered me in at no time at all. I sat down, and they asked me how I'd been. Of course, I didn't tell the horror stories of life in a flood plane, nor about the Weasil parties, nor about the raincoat-wearing/flashing neighbour, nor about the mailbox-stealing beavers, or how me road was washed away forever, nor about the hired help with the chain saw, no none of that did I mention. Instead, "Life is great!" I declared through me pearly whites.
The dentist told me to open wide, poked around, and said, "Gabe, as usual, there is no cavity in sight. Keep up what you're doing; your teeth look great!"
He buzzed in his associate and said, "Take a look at this clean, well-kept mouth, Dr. Abbron." And sure enough, I have another set of hands poking around in me mouth and a lot of glowing sounds and nods of approval, and he says to his nurse, "Kathy, come take a look at this; this is what a healthy mouth looks like." Well, they all took a turn, all six of them and me ego was very tall indeed, it was.
One of the dental assistants says to me in an embarrassed way, "You know, I thought all people in the UK had yellow, rotten teeth."
Ah, how nice, I think to meself, but I say, "I be from Ireland; we eat plenty of iron-rich potatoes, so our teeth are white and strong. But the English, well, they drink large amounts of tea, and it stains their teeth. It does; that's why they look so bloody awful." I be proud not to be an Englishman at moments like these.
The hygienist came in, took a peek at me fine set of choppers, and said, "Gabriel, all our patients should have mouths like yours." Then she polished the choppers to a blinding shine.
Before I left, they were all wearing sunglasses and waving goodbye; it was that grand a check-up.
I was driving down the highway, and as I pulled up to the red light, the women in the car beside me looked over. I smiled, and they grabbed each other's arms in excitement. They smiled back, talked to each other, pointed to their teeth and then to mine, and nodded that my choppers were beautiful.
I pulled away, passed a few cars and came to the next red light, and the same thing happened. The woman in the car next to me looked over, I smiled, and she put on her sunglasses and nodded and smiled, pointing at me bright white choppers and mouthing at me, "Lovely."
I made sure I hit every red light on the way home. That boosted the old ego, so many admiring me choppers in so little time. Sigh.
When I got home, I was very thirsty from all that smiling I did. So as not to get the choppers full of sugar, I sipped a Coke A Cola through a straw. We can't damage the enamel with sugar now, can we? The only thing I was sad about was that I didn't take stock in the sunglasses trade. I could have made a small fortune driving home.
Gabe
Copyright © 2007 All rights reserved
