Sometimes Revenge Can Relieve The Pain

14 October 2022

1083

R. Linda:

Oh begorrah, where to start this time! Several things have been happening in the life, as you know. First, it started off with me having stomach troubles, then it was me having an eye problem, then it was me experiencing knee and back problems. So let's start with health crisis Number 1 - stomach troubles. The spicy food has finally caught up with yours truly. It used to be the harbinger of bad dreams, but now it is a pain in the old tum. Once I had a change of diet, the stomach settled down. No sooner was that taken care of than the paper cut one of me kiddos gave me years ago seemed to have manifested into some problem with me eye. And if you don't think the Dragon Lady had a field day with THAT you are sadly mistaken. I had laser surgery to correct the problem leaving me partially blind in one eye before the eye doctors found a mass behind the eye. Needless surgery. I've had to live with this for months now and it is an adjustment I can tell you that much. 

Recently, I have had this phantom pain in my knee that was accompanied by a tight feeling above and below the knee and then nerve pain up to the small of my back. Add to that, I have lost the strength to go up the stairs like a normal person, me bad leg gives out from under me. The pain was so intense I was taken by ambulance to hospital. They did nothing, R. Linda. It was 4 a.m. and they told me I was dehydrated. The ambulance driver and fellow EMT couldn't get an IV into me because I was so dehydrated me veins had collapsed. When we arrived at hospital ER the doors were locked and they had to bang on them to get an orderly to open up all the while the cold wind blowing and yours truly thought pneumonia was next. They wheeled me in and the orderly informed us that he wasn't a nurse, that there were only three working and two doctors because staffing was short. I did get a proper IV when a woman came in and stuck an IV in me arm. I think she was a nurse, and I hope she was, but I don't know I never saw her after that. About 20 minutes later a nurse came in (she introduced herself as such) and took vitals and talked with the ambulance men writing things down, then she told them the doctors were only 2 and both were busy, but she'd have them look at me as soon as she saw one of them. Well, that was hopeful -- NOT! About two hours later a doctor came and said she had been watching my legs and they didn't stop moving. Well, hell I was in pain and couldn't get comfortable, but SHE decided I might have Restless Leg Syndrome! They pumped me with morphine that did not kill the pain but mercifully put me into a light sleep as I was exhausted. At about 7 a.m. I asked for ice chips and was given a glass of warm ginger ale. No food, no nothing but I was told Tonya was on her way to pick me up. At 12:30 p.m. (uh-huh), they nearly threw me in a wheelchair and rolled me to the hospital entrance where they left me in front of the cold door that opened with a blast of chilly air every time someone came in or out. I was in me pajamas and a frozen, pain-filled block of ice by the time Tonya arrived. Seems they forgot to call her at 7 and remembered around 12. She told me they told her to make an appointment with my GP and see what that person would prescribe. She did that and got a Monday appointment. This all happened on Friday. So calculate that I was in pain for two more days! The hospital wouldn't recommend anything for severe pain but Tylenol!!! And they couldn't diagnose me trouble! No clue what be wrong with me.

On Monday, the GP gave me a steroid pack with a muscle relaxer and painkiller. The steroid pack actually worked the other two did nothing. 

After 2 MRIs, a CAT scan and an ultrasound, it was determined the knee and back pain may be spinal. This, after they at first suggested the pain was caused by Restless Legs Syndrome (I don't have that), then the guess was because I had my Covid booster three days after the problem started, it was from that. I suggested sciatica. They jumped on that. Told me yes, yes, that could be it! I was sent to an Orthopaedic surgeon who thinks it might be slipped disks OR sciatica. I have an MRI appointment next week to see if any of that computes with my pain. Meanwhile, I have had two sessions of steroids, and Ibuprofen seems to work where the muscle relaxer and painkiller did not! Go figure.

So there was all THAT and that be why I have not written much, as it has not been a humourous time.

Meanwhile, Mam was all upset about yours truly and offered to take me to one of my doctor appointments since it is hard to drive when in dreadful pain and you can see out of only one eye. This she did, and after almost four weeks with no sleep from the pain, I came out of the doctor's appointment and with poor vision and a foggy brain, was about to get into the wrong car. Yes, R. Linda, I opened the passenger side of a blue sedan thinking it was me Mam's vehicle when it was not. Thank goodness she was with me or I would have been sitting in some unsuspecting person's car and imagine the jolt they'd get. And I haven't heard the last of that.

It has been four long weeks of this. Anyway, not long after I developed the painful condition that I don't know what it is yet, Sean came grunting down the stairs last Saturday, one step at a time. He was bent over double coming into the living room and I thought he was making fun of yours truly, but seems he was not. He was in dire straights and his knee was swollen. Now all the time I have been struggling, he hasn't asked after me, or asked me how I was or if he could do anything. No, he avoided me until Saturday asking me what he should do. He was nowhere to be found when someone else was in need. Did I think he had what I had? No, I did not. It wasn't the same symptoms. It's been amusing to watch him. He is one of those people who when he gets sick or hurt you'd think he was on death's door. He makes so much out of it and then there be me who quietly goes about me day trying not to complain or show I am having trouble. Me Mam doesn't know which is worse. 

Though I be finding revenge be sweet. He did start feeling better after he took me air cast and used it without asking (I was hunting all over for it and needed it more than he), anyway, once I got it back he came limping into the living room where I was icing the knee and watching the telly trying to get me mind off my woes. He had his tablet and showed me a gazebo on Facebook for $30. He wanted to buy it. Now I be not on FB but I know enough about it to know that some of the adverts are scams. I looked hard at the thing and it said it was the same as advertised on Home Depot for $1300. Ah yup. I said, "Do what you want, I don't care." 

Well, he did think it was quite a deal, a $1300 gazebo for $30. Well, today the gazebo arrived. The advert said it was 8 x 10. Well, it is a whole 8" x 10" -- turns out to be a doll house miniature! Yup, yup, yuppers as the Weasil would say. I be smiling through me pain.

Gabe

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