07 May 2018
Story #906
R. Linda:
While running a hotel with resident guests, including me cousin and dragon-in-law, the wife decided she needed a raise. This wasn't a good time to ask for one, because with education funding in the state, it isn't like there be extra money for raises. But she was determined to at least try so we can keep the hotel running efficiently.
In the interim, she went to the hairdressers for a new "do" because she was tired of the straight look and came home with an interesting look called the peek-a-boo. She had red ends dyed into the underside of her hair, and I was rather astonished she'd go for that. She's a soccer mom, so to step outside the box would be unusual.
"You think Matt (the school super) will notice?" She said fingering the red tips.
"Well,. . . I sure do, but then I . . . " I didn't know what to say. Maybe I should have said, "For sure, he'd notice why you did that now?" But instead, I let my voice trail off with a shrug.
"Ok well, I just hope he doesn't mind non-conformists like me." And off she went with a flip of the red tips.
"I'm sure he won't," I muttered, shaking me head, thinking the opposite.
Tonya is somewhat frazzled with all the relatives in the house. She had just gotten used to Mam moving in, then her mother, who drives her up a pole, comes for too frequent extended stays, and now me cousin Sean, who doesn't do much to help out, moves in. His usual answer when asked to help be, "I need to be stepping off now, I be." I counter with, "Sean, I think it's time to join Uber, I do." The Dragon does help, and me Mam be a household workaholic, but when it comes to Sean, well, you'd think he was the squire of the estate, you would.
I think Tonya hasn't received the attention she is used to from the kiddos. They take the battle for their affections between their grandmothers very seriously and play the two of them off against each other, leaving their mother in a lurch, so to speak. Add to this the novelty of cousin Sean, and well, the poor woman has definitely taken a backseat.
Then there's me, the constant peacekeeper (or at least I try to be) who spends his time breaking up the grandmother wars and trying to convince me cousin to get a job AND a place of his own. I must tell you this, Sean lives in his camper out back. That unfortunately, frees up a room for Dragon when she over stays, but regarding Sean, there are camp grounds and trailer parks, so why not go there instead of being the eyesore I see first thing I get up from me bedroom window. I tell ya!
"Ooh ye whorie too mooch aboot Sean, one day you'll see he'll do da Irish goodbye an' you won't notice for a month he picked up an' left, ya won't dare Gabriel," Mam assures me this will happen. Let's see, it's been how many months going on a year that has not happened? I won't be holding me breath.
Last weekend, Sean regaled me over breakfast about the advantages of using eHarmony to find a girlfriend.
"'eHarmony -- making New Years resolutions? Well, eHarmony can help with one." He read.
"Wait a minute, it isn't New Year's." I pointed out.
"I noo dis be an old advert, but it says here, 'Now through Tuesday on eharmony.com you can check out our matches and message them for free. That's right, you can message your matches for free.'"
I looked at him and shook me head, but that didn't stop him.
"This bloke says, 'Before eHarmony, I was meeting girls through friends, and I just didn't meet the quality of girls I was looking for. I am so thankful for eHarmony, the calibre was a lot higher.'"
"Sounds like an advert for expensive call girls," I grunted.
"Wots wrong wit dat? Da President dates porn stars."
"Ye got a point dare Sean, ya do." It's stuff like this that drives me up a pole.
Just this morn, he said he was "stepping out" after I came in and asked what help he would be to me or Mam, this day. Of course, she was no help calling after him to "Don't spend up, Sean." AS IF! "Bob on there, Sean!" I yelled after him, annoyed.
"Eee's still tryin' ta find 'emself, I be sure dare be sumthin' out dare." Mam quipped.
Meanwhile, the Dragon complained that the New Hampshire weather had curtailed her visits here. "Snow, snow and more snow! Does it never stop?" She had complained. Tonya did inform her that "Spring in New Hampshire is a relative term." Oh yes it is. Add to this Mam comes in and tells us the boyos have built a really nice "fart" outside. I knew what she meant, but Dragon was looking at her over her half glasses like she didn't hear her right. "Fort, snow fort," I pronounced for her and relief spread over her face with a silent thank you.
Last Friday, Tonya met with her boss who couldn't stop looking at her shoulders. She couldn't fathom why, but I knew, yes I did, those red tips were resting there and he probably wondered what was wrong with her, she'd do that to herself. A few other elementary teachers are sporting that same peek-a-boo thing with purple or blue tips. I don't get it. Needless to say, things didn't go well, and she wondered why.
I was going into work, and I was subject (as I got me gear together ) to the newspaper headline reading courtesy of Dragon: "Oh look here it says Princess Kate gave birth to a boot! What? Are the Brits losing it?" I looked over her shoulder and read, "Princess Kate gave birth to a boy! Geez Louise!" Then Mam told Dragon she was taking the "cartons" down to wash for spring cleaning and would Dragon get the ones in the kitchen down for her.
"Cartons? I don't see any cartons? Why would she want to wash cartons?" Dragon said to me all full of confused consternation.
"CURTAINS, the things on the windows, she's from Ireland, she has an accent," I said, pointing to the window CURTAINS.
The snow has finally stopped, but the rain and wind have taken over. We have one or two days of partly sunny weather before it gets gloomy. At least there was no fog, so Dragon could catch her flight out and I would be Dragon free for a short time. But Sean be here still, he's complaining Game of Thrones wasn't on this April and hasn't stopped yammering about it a month later. I told him a new Game of Thrones was set for 19 May, if he cared to get up very early to view it. I told him it was a whole day event and he's excited. I didn't tell him it was the Harry Megan wedding, but ask me if I care.
Gabe
Copyright © 2018 All rights reserved
Story #906
R. Linda:
While running a hotel with resident guests, including me cousin and dragon-in-law, the wife decided she needed a raise. This wasn't a good time to ask for one, because with education funding in the state, it isn't like there be extra money for raises. But she was determined to at least try so we can keep the hotel running efficiently.
In the interim, she went to the hairdressers for a new "do" because she was tired of the straight look and came home with an interesting look called the peek-a-boo. She had red ends dyed into the underside of her hair, and I was rather astonished she'd go for that. She's a soccer mom, so to step outside the box would be unusual.
"You think Matt (the school super) will notice?" She said fingering the red tips.
"Well,. . . I sure do, but then I . . . " I didn't know what to say. Maybe I should have said, "For sure, he'd notice why you did that now?" But instead, I let my voice trail off with a shrug.
"Ok well, I just hope he doesn't mind non-conformists like me." And off she went with a flip of the red tips.
"I'm sure he won't," I muttered, shaking me head, thinking the opposite.
Tonya is somewhat frazzled with all the relatives in the house. She had just gotten used to Mam moving in, then her mother, who drives her up a pole, comes for too frequent extended stays, and now me cousin Sean, who doesn't do much to help out, moves in. His usual answer when asked to help be, "I need to be stepping off now, I be." I counter with, "Sean, I think it's time to join Uber, I do." The Dragon does help, and me Mam be a household workaholic, but when it comes to Sean, well, you'd think he was the squire of the estate, you would.
I think Tonya hasn't received the attention she is used to from the kiddos. They take the battle for their affections between their grandmothers very seriously and play the two of them off against each other, leaving their mother in a lurch, so to speak. Add to this the novelty of cousin Sean, and well, the poor woman has definitely taken a backseat.
Then there's me, the constant peacekeeper (or at least I try to be) who spends his time breaking up the grandmother wars and trying to convince me cousin to get a job AND a place of his own. I must tell you this, Sean lives in his camper out back. That unfortunately, frees up a room for Dragon when she over stays, but regarding Sean, there are camp grounds and trailer parks, so why not go there instead of being the eyesore I see first thing I get up from me bedroom window. I tell ya!
"Ooh ye whorie too mooch aboot Sean, one day you'll see he'll do da Irish goodbye an' you won't notice for a month he picked up an' left, ya won't dare Gabriel," Mam assures me this will happen. Let's see, it's been how many months going on a year that has not happened? I won't be holding me breath.
Last weekend, Sean regaled me over breakfast about the advantages of using eHarmony to find a girlfriend.
"'eHarmony -- making New Years resolutions? Well, eHarmony can help with one." He read.
"Wait a minute, it isn't New Year's." I pointed out.
"I noo dis be an old advert, but it says here, 'Now through Tuesday on eharmony.com you can check out our matches and message them for free. That's right, you can message your matches for free.'"
I looked at him and shook me head, but that didn't stop him.
"This bloke says, 'Before eHarmony, I was meeting girls through friends, and I just didn't meet the quality of girls I was looking for. I am so thankful for eHarmony, the calibre was a lot higher.'"
"Sounds like an advert for expensive call girls," I grunted.
"Wots wrong wit dat? Da President dates porn stars."
"Ye got a point dare Sean, ya do." It's stuff like this that drives me up a pole.
Just this morn, he said he was "stepping out" after I came in and asked what help he would be to me or Mam, this day. Of course, she was no help calling after him to "Don't spend up, Sean." AS IF! "Bob on there, Sean!" I yelled after him, annoyed.
"Eee's still tryin' ta find 'emself, I be sure dare be sumthin' out dare." Mam quipped.
Meanwhile, the Dragon complained that the New Hampshire weather had curtailed her visits here. "Snow, snow and more snow! Does it never stop?" She had complained. Tonya did inform her that "Spring in New Hampshire is a relative term." Oh yes it is. Add to this Mam comes in and tells us the boyos have built a really nice "fart" outside. I knew what she meant, but Dragon was looking at her over her half glasses like she didn't hear her right. "Fort, snow fort," I pronounced for her and relief spread over her face with a silent thank you.
Last Friday, Tonya met with her boss who couldn't stop looking at her shoulders. She couldn't fathom why, but I knew, yes I did, those red tips were resting there and he probably wondered what was wrong with her, she'd do that to herself. A few other elementary teachers are sporting that same peek-a-boo thing with purple or blue tips. I don't get it. Needless to say, things didn't go well, and she wondered why.
I was going into work, and I was subject (as I got me gear together ) to the newspaper headline reading courtesy of Dragon: "Oh look here it says Princess Kate gave birth to a boot! What? Are the Brits losing it?" I looked over her shoulder and read, "Princess Kate gave birth to a boy! Geez Louise!" Then Mam told Dragon she was taking the "cartons" down to wash for spring cleaning and would Dragon get the ones in the kitchen down for her.
"Cartons? I don't see any cartons? Why would she want to wash cartons?" Dragon said to me all full of confused consternation.
"CURTAINS, the things on the windows, she's from Ireland, she has an accent," I said, pointing to the window CURTAINS.
The snow has finally stopped, but the rain and wind have taken over. We have one or two days of partly sunny weather before it gets gloomy. At least there was no fog, so Dragon could catch her flight out and I would be Dragon free for a short time. But Sean be here still, he's complaining Game of Thrones wasn't on this April and hasn't stopped yammering about it a month later. I told him a new Game of Thrones was set for 19 May, if he cared to get up very early to view it. I told him it was a whole day event and he's excited. I didn't tell him it was the Harry Megan wedding, but ask me if I care.
Gabe
Copyright © 2018 All rights reserved
i am glad sean is an O'Sullivan and not an O'Connor. he is right? as to the red tipping, uh no not a good idea when going for a raise and seems like a need for attention to do that. sorry but...
ReplyDeleteYes to red tipping! LOL as for crazy house.not so much
ReplyDelete