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R. Linda:
I wrote: I find meself calling you Rolonda now. It has been Tonya saying to me, "Gabe, bring another piece of Rolonda's delicious fudge over here, get the uh . . . orange, no make that the one underneath that. Thanks babe." And then there is Tonya eating the fudge in front of the telly (I actually caught her with the Chocie Box on her lap), "Boy that Rolonda sure makes the best fudge," and "Tell Rolonda a thousand thank yous, but tell her I'm placing a curse on her if I weigh in at 100 lbs more than I am right now. Oh! I should go weigh myself. Nah, the fudge is too good, don't care."
SO it be Rolonda this and Rolonda that and I called you that meself this morning, so used to it I be getting. I said to Tonya, "Do NOT eat all of Rolonda's fudge. Save me some." Because I be sure since she be off today, it will be quite a different looking Chocie Box when I come home.
All right I be off for work. Taking a piece of fudge with me to munch on while I sit in traffic. Let's just hope I remember to look at me face in the rear-view mirror before I get out of the car. Don't want to walk into work looking like a three year old on a chocolate binge.
Much later I wrote: After this I don't think we'll want fudge. Ever. We feel like we live in Fudgetown. I got home thinking I was going to have a big juicy steak, and there was me wife, her eyes glazed over, she'd been home all day and she had been in the fudge. I sat down at table, loosened me tie, took up me fork and knife and she put the plate in front of me. Odd I didn't smell any steak, and as I looked down what did I see? I huge slab of raspberry fudge! I looked at her.
"This isn't steak," I said.
"Oh." That is all she said and then popped a piece of it in her mouth and disappeared with the Chocie Box. I had raspberry fudge for dinner. Yup.
And much, much later I wrote: I think a chocie stupor about describes it. Actually, we are all sick with some kind of upper respiratory thing. I'm going to work but me throat be sore. Tonya and the Airport are staying home with the Chocie Box. And we know what that means. By the time I get home they will have polished it off. Actually, not a bad thing considering I have never seen so much fudge in me life. I be fudged out. I never thought I'd say that. We have the almond left. Tonya be still at it, but me and the Airport, just can't do it.
You wrote: I REALLY DO HATE FUDGE RIGHT NOW!!! LOL
I Replied: We pigged out and ate most of it. I gave away about 4 lbs but the other 4 1/2 we consumed. We had it for breakfast, for lunch (Tonya wrapped a piece the size of a sandwich in wax paper and I thought it was a sandwich until I opened it), and snacks. You know I was served a healthy helping for dinner. Sigh. I can't tell you how disappointed I was. She said, I should eat it because if I did not she'd eat it and come down with a very troubling case of cellulite. That be me dinner for one night it was. I felt ghastly after, but not so bad I didn't down a chunk of it later while watching the telly.
You wrote: Did you ever look in the back of the fridge? I'm pretty sure the honey fudge jar said to refrigerate after opening. Unless you happen to like green food. LOL.
I replied: Since I have the graveyard shift at work yesterday, I decided since it was mild to shovel the back porch off today. I went to me bedroom to get me old jeans on and I can't fit into them! I be fat. I am really, really fat. We are celebrating the fudge being gone by going on diets tomorrow, but we are celebrating with a piece of fudge each. Yeah!
Oh yeah, and that honey fudge . . . funny thing about that honey fudge, I got the bread to toast and I went to get the honey fudge and I couldn't find it. There is only one explanation and I'm looking at her right now trying to zip a jacket that doesn't seem to fit anymore. And I emphasize the word TRYING.
And later on I wrote: I be still investigating where that jar could have gone too. I really cannot believe she ate the whole thing by herself. I'll let you know. I bet she hid it.
Sherlock O'Sullivan (no job too big or small, well unless it has to do with fudge, then no job too big). If Tonya sees me looking she'll ask me what I be looking for. Knowing I be on the Fudge Watcher's Diet she'll call me counsellor and then eat the honey fudge herself. I KNOW HER.
Even later I write: She put it in with the jellies and forgot about it. But now I have it in with the mustards which she doesn't use. Now do I spread it on toast or what? Once refrigerated, do I have to heat it or just scoop it out like jam? Another question for you: What is it really? Candy or a spread? I think I should go on a diet I can't get me new jeans buttoned.
You wrote: You should have worn your jeans when you were eating the fudge! So when the jeans started getting a little tight YOU PUT DOWN THE FUDGE. I have the fixings to make a batch of you know what and I think I'll be making some this week. The thought of more fudge make your tummy bubble? I'm caving and making the fudge. So I'll weigh 400 lbs, you'll finally get to see me on Dr. Phil when I'm begging for his help getting out the front door!!! I didn't feel like cooking tonight, so we had burritos from Chubby's. Heartburn delight!
I replied: This is a contest isn't it? To see who can get fatter faster. You are a terrible person, LMAO.
Gabe
Copyright © 2008 All rights reserved
R. Linda:
I wrote: I find meself calling you Rolonda now. It has been Tonya saying to me, "Gabe, bring another piece of Rolonda's delicious fudge over here, get the uh . . . orange, no make that the one underneath that. Thanks babe." And then there is Tonya eating the fudge in front of the telly (I actually caught her with the Chocie Box on her lap), "Boy that Rolonda sure makes the best fudge," and "Tell Rolonda a thousand thank yous, but tell her I'm placing a curse on her if I weigh in at 100 lbs more than I am right now. Oh! I should go weigh myself. Nah, the fudge is too good, don't care."
SO it be Rolonda this and Rolonda that and I called you that meself this morning, so used to it I be getting. I said to Tonya, "Do NOT eat all of Rolonda's fudge. Save me some." Because I be sure since she be off today, it will be quite a different looking Chocie Box when I come home.
All right I be off for work. Taking a piece of fudge with me to munch on while I sit in traffic. Let's just hope I remember to look at me face in the rear-view mirror before I get out of the car. Don't want to walk into work looking like a three year old on a chocolate binge.
Much later I wrote: After this I don't think we'll want fudge. Ever. We feel like we live in Fudgetown. I got home thinking I was going to have a big juicy steak, and there was me wife, her eyes glazed over, she'd been home all day and she had been in the fudge. I sat down at table, loosened me tie, took up me fork and knife and she put the plate in front of me. Odd I didn't smell any steak, and as I looked down what did I see? I huge slab of raspberry fudge! I looked at her.
"This isn't steak," I said.
"Oh." That is all she said and then popped a piece of it in her mouth and disappeared with the Chocie Box. I had raspberry fudge for dinner. Yup.
And much, much later I wrote: I think a chocie stupor about describes it. Actually, we are all sick with some kind of upper respiratory thing. I'm going to work but me throat be sore. Tonya and the Airport are staying home with the Chocie Box. And we know what that means. By the time I get home they will have polished it off. Actually, not a bad thing considering I have never seen so much fudge in me life. I be fudged out. I never thought I'd say that. We have the almond left. Tonya be still at it, but me and the Airport, just can't do it.
You wrote: I REALLY DO HATE FUDGE RIGHT NOW!!! LOL
I Replied: We pigged out and ate most of it. I gave away about 4 lbs but the other 4 1/2 we consumed. We had it for breakfast, for lunch (Tonya wrapped a piece the size of a sandwich in wax paper and I thought it was a sandwich until I opened it), and snacks. You know I was served a healthy helping for dinner. Sigh. I can't tell you how disappointed I was. She said, I should eat it because if I did not she'd eat it and come down with a very troubling case of cellulite. That be me dinner for one night it was. I felt ghastly after, but not so bad I didn't down a chunk of it later while watching the telly.
You wrote: Did you ever look in the back of the fridge? I'm pretty sure the honey fudge jar said to refrigerate after opening. Unless you happen to like green food. LOL.
I replied: Since I have the graveyard shift at work yesterday, I decided since it was mild to shovel the back porch off today. I went to me bedroom to get me old jeans on and I can't fit into them! I be fat. I am really, really fat. We are celebrating the fudge being gone by going on diets tomorrow, but we are celebrating with a piece of fudge each. Yeah!
Oh yeah, and that honey fudge . . . funny thing about that honey fudge, I got the bread to toast and I went to get the honey fudge and I couldn't find it. There is only one explanation and I'm looking at her right now trying to zip a jacket that doesn't seem to fit anymore. And I emphasize the word TRYING.
And later on I wrote: I be still investigating where that jar could have gone too. I really cannot believe she ate the whole thing by herself. I'll let you know. I bet she hid it.
Sherlock O'Sullivan (no job too big or small, well unless it has to do with fudge, then no job too big). If Tonya sees me looking she'll ask me what I be looking for. Knowing I be on the Fudge Watcher's Diet she'll call me counsellor and then eat the honey fudge herself. I KNOW HER.
Even later I write: She put it in with the jellies and forgot about it. But now I have it in with the mustards which she doesn't use. Now do I spread it on toast or what? Once refrigerated, do I have to heat it or just scoop it out like jam? Another question for you: What is it really? Candy or a spread? I think I should go on a diet I can't get me new jeans buttoned.
You wrote: You should have worn your jeans when you were eating the fudge! So when the jeans started getting a little tight YOU PUT DOWN THE FUDGE. I have the fixings to make a batch of you know what and I think I'll be making some this week. The thought of more fudge make your tummy bubble? I'm caving and making the fudge. So I'll weigh 400 lbs, you'll finally get to see me on Dr. Phil when I'm begging for his help getting out the front door!!! I didn't feel like cooking tonight, so we had burritos from Chubby's. Heartburn delight!
I replied: This is a contest isn't it? To see who can get fatter faster. You are a terrible person, LMAO.
Gabe
Copyright © 2008 All rights reserved
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