Local Network Faux Pas

 22 April 2025

Story #1134

R. Linda:

Ah, to live to 989 years old! Yes, that was flashed before our eyes yesterday when a news bulletin of the Pope's passing was broadcast on all our New Hampshire tellys. It was Mam who first spied it. She put down her knitting, slid her readers down her nose, and looked at the TV screen hard. She shook her head in denial, then threw the knitting down and got up, staring at the screen as she got close to it. Then she said, Jayus, Mary an' Joseph dats not roight!"

I put down me tablet and asked her what was not right. 

She took the remote and backtracked until she reached the flash bulletin on the screen. She paused it and, with raised eyebrows and a nod toward the screen, said, "Do ye see wot I see?"

This was what she saw

I got up, too, and approached the TV, and yes, yes, I did. The birthdate on the screen was way wrong. 

"Fake news!" I blurted out. "He doesn't look a day over 88!"

"No, the man passed. He did, but he wasn't . . . " She stopped to calculate in her head. "He wasn't 989 years old. He was not."

"Uh oh," the eldest child sneered. "Someone fecked up." 

Before Mam could get on him for the F word, even if it was said as we Irish say it, I took the remote and fast-forwarded it. Sure enough, it was corrected within minutes with another banner with the correct date. 

"That wouldn't happen on the National News stations," Jersey Girl Tonya said from the doorway. "Someone's head would roll with the importance of that news being broadcast to the world."

And she's right. 

The local news has improved in the thirty-five years I've been here. I know that local news stations give new presenters their start, hoping they can transition to the bigger national news networks. My New Jersey relatives were horrified at some of the presenters because they did not have the polished, fashionable, or professional makeup faces of what they were used to in the New York area. When they visit, they look at the Boston networks for the slick broadcasts. Like I tell them, everyone has to start somewhere, which apparently goes for the local news graphics department. 

I'm sorry Pope Francis has passed. In Ireland, John Paul is still the big favourite with that Catholic nation, but Francis was special to me. His policies were sound and modern. I will miss him very much. 

Gabe

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