24 March 2017
Story #855
R. Linda:
Yeah, I said I wasn't going to any more kiddie fundraisers, but this wasn't precisely a fundraiser, although I lost three bucks on attending. Me eldest came home all excited, saying that he was running a carnival booth. It was math week, and the school was hosting a math carnival, where children ran through booths that required them to solve math problems to win prizes. It seems simple: in and out, and home we go. An hour of yelling at the kiddos was better than the four and a half hours I had on the pizza and movie excursion.
I said, yes, I'd love to attend. Yeah, I know I didn't give it much thought, I was thinking an hour of children silently trying to figure out math equations, counting on fingers or worse, calculating on their cell phones at each booth, and it wouldn't be so noisy or hyper as there were no soft drinks and candy. Well, I was wrong, and it was too soon after the Monday night fiasco to attend another. I need to recuperate at least a week, not a few days, to steel meself for the next chaotic kiddie show.
The eldest had stayed after school to set up his math booth, so the rest of us piled in the car (Mam being the only holdout, but we dragged her along kicking and screaming anyway, poor soul), and arrived at the designated hour, 6 p.m. Getting out of the car was fine; we met other parents we knew, and inside we all went thinking easy-peasy, one hour, and we were out. Well, as soon as I opened the school door to let everyone through (yes, I was the doorman yet again), I could hear the shouting of excited kiddos and out of the corner of me eye, some were running about chasing each other. Oh boy, here we go AGAIN.
Once inside, we found it rather crowded, which surprised me, but it was nice for the kids running the carnival to have a good turnout. Parents were standing in groups, chatting, while small wee ones, including our youngest, chased around. The middle one was with friends visiting the math booths and yelling out any answer that came to mind, and general chaos ensued.
The supervising teachers were dressed as clowns, so recognising the ones I knew was a bit difficult. The kiddos running the booths seemed to not care if their contestants got the answer right or wrong; they were enjoying being in charge. We went up on the stage that overlooked the floor where all the booths were, only to find a refreshment stand with candy and popcorn for sale, as well as a few additional booths being run by two teachers in clown disguises.
All of my brood had me buy them cotton candy, and I didn't want to because I was taking them out for dinner afterwards and didn't want to feed them pure sugar and further excite them. But to keep them from acting up in front of everyone, I caved. I know pushover me.
The fact is that the wee one (when he doesn't get his way) becomes his alter-ego, Georgie and OMG. Georgie was a cousin of me wife's. He was the cutest little angel as a child and one look at that tow-head with those big blue eyes and you'd think choir music would waft through the air. BUT Georgie was anything but angelic; he was a demon in disguise, dressed in a guise you'd never think could be so disruptive. He ran away at the tender age of ten (I think I told you this story) and boarded a railroad car to travel to another town. Yup, me youngest has inherited the Georgie gene, he has. And the last thing I wanted was Georgie in a restaurant.
Well, the wee one ran directly into a preschool buddy, and they bumped heads, causing the buddy to howl at the top of his lungs, and mine to run away and hide. We found him behind a heavy-set clown and had to console him that it was an accident and though he wasn't hurt, his friend was feeling the blow and would be fine . . . eventually. The middle one, Guido, had a fistful of tickets, and I have no clue where he got them, as he is not the mathematical whiz his older brother is. We couldn't sort that out as he was not forthcoming until he later told us he had collected all the tickets that others had dropped on the floor. So, at the end of the night, he was the big winner of the single prize offered for gathering the most tickets by answering correctly at both. I tell ya, that Guido is going to be something else when he gets older!
The eldest, O'Hare, was very happy with the booth running, but a bit annoyed we didn't come over to play his game. We were told it was for the kiddos only. Otherwise, we would have. As it was, we didn't get to speak with him because he was busy running the game. Who knew? So all of us, except Guido and the wee headbanger, were in the doggy house. Oh, and Mam had the excuse that she didn't have her glasses and couldn't see. Right, O'Hare's booth had huge round circles and multiplication, division, addition and subtraction signs that you'd have to be totally blind not to see. But he believed her. She's as bad as Guido, telling him she came over, but she couldn't see!
Here are a few shots of the carnival:
Story #855
R. Linda:
Yeah, I said I wasn't going to any more kiddie fundraisers, but this wasn't precisely a fundraiser, although I lost three bucks on attending. Me eldest came home all excited, saying that he was running a carnival booth. It was math week, and the school was hosting a math carnival, where children ran through booths that required them to solve math problems to win prizes. It seems simple: in and out, and home we go. An hour of yelling at the kiddos was better than the four and a half hours I had on the pizza and movie excursion.
I said, yes, I'd love to attend. Yeah, I know I didn't give it much thought, I was thinking an hour of children silently trying to figure out math equations, counting on fingers or worse, calculating on their cell phones at each booth, and it wouldn't be so noisy or hyper as there were no soft drinks and candy. Well, I was wrong, and it was too soon after the Monday night fiasco to attend another. I need to recuperate at least a week, not a few days, to steel meself for the next chaotic kiddie show.
The eldest had stayed after school to set up his math booth, so the rest of us piled in the car (Mam being the only holdout, but we dragged her along kicking and screaming anyway, poor soul), and arrived at the designated hour, 6 p.m. Getting out of the car was fine; we met other parents we knew, and inside we all went thinking easy-peasy, one hour, and we were out. Well, as soon as I opened the school door to let everyone through (yes, I was the doorman yet again), I could hear the shouting of excited kiddos and out of the corner of me eye, some were running about chasing each other. Oh boy, here we go AGAIN.
Once inside, we found it rather crowded, which surprised me, but it was nice for the kids running the carnival to have a good turnout. Parents were standing in groups, chatting, while small wee ones, including our youngest, chased around. The middle one was with friends visiting the math booths and yelling out any answer that came to mind, and general chaos ensued.
The supervising teachers were dressed as clowns, so recognising the ones I knew was a bit difficult. The kiddos running the booths seemed to not care if their contestants got the answer right or wrong; they were enjoying being in charge. We went up on the stage that overlooked the floor where all the booths were, only to find a refreshment stand with candy and popcorn for sale, as well as a few additional booths being run by two teachers in clown disguises.
All of my brood had me buy them cotton candy, and I didn't want to because I was taking them out for dinner afterwards and didn't want to feed them pure sugar and further excite them. But to keep them from acting up in front of everyone, I caved. I know pushover me.
The fact is that the wee one (when he doesn't get his way) becomes his alter-ego, Georgie and OMG. Georgie was a cousin of me wife's. He was the cutest little angel as a child and one look at that tow-head with those big blue eyes and you'd think choir music would waft through the air. BUT Georgie was anything but angelic; he was a demon in disguise, dressed in a guise you'd never think could be so disruptive. He ran away at the tender age of ten (I think I told you this story) and boarded a railroad car to travel to another town. Yup, me youngest has inherited the Georgie gene, he has. And the last thing I wanted was Georgie in a restaurant.
Well, the wee one ran directly into a preschool buddy, and they bumped heads, causing the buddy to howl at the top of his lungs, and mine to run away and hide. We found him behind a heavy-set clown and had to console him that it was an accident and though he wasn't hurt, his friend was feeling the blow and would be fine . . . eventually. The middle one, Guido, had a fistful of tickets, and I have no clue where he got them, as he is not the mathematical whiz his older brother is. We couldn't sort that out as he was not forthcoming until he later told us he had collected all the tickets that others had dropped on the floor. So, at the end of the night, he was the big winner of the single prize offered for gathering the most tickets by answering correctly at both. I tell ya, that Guido is going to be something else when he gets older!
The eldest, O'Hare, was very happy with the booth running, but a bit annoyed we didn't come over to play his game. We were told it was for the kiddos only. Otherwise, we would have. As it was, we didn't get to speak with him because he was busy running the game. Who knew? So all of us, except Guido and the wee headbanger, were in the doggy house. Oh, and Mam had the excuse that she didn't have her glasses and couldn't see. Right, O'Hare's booth had huge round circles and multiplication, division, addition and subtraction signs that you'd have to be totally blind not to see. But he believed her. She's as bad as Guido, telling him she came over, but she couldn't see!
Here are a few shots of the carnival:
 |
| The upper stage where we were 'hiding' |
 |
| Nearing the end |
Afterwards, and promptly at 7 p.m. we headed out of Noise Central and got into the car with two tired kiddos, the eldest and the youngest along with Mam and headed out to the small town over for dinner at a place that reminds me of an Irish pub but is a small corner eatery across from the river. Here is a lovely picture of the river dam.
 |
| Picturesque huh? |
So, because O'Hare had eaten pizza at school, he wasn't hungry, but he'd have dessert. This sparked a ruckus of sorts, with his two younger siblings not wanting proper dinner but rather ice cream sundaes on a cold North Pole night. Their mother told them that if they ate their dinner, they could have dessert. We ordered, and it looked quite weird, all of us with dinner plates and the eldest with the biggest ice cream sundae I'd ever seen. This caused a patron on her way out to stop at our table and ask if there was a special occasion, like maybe his birthday, that he was getting ice cream instead of eating his dinner. Oh boy. Tonya (who had a mouthful of salad) took exception, I could see as she turned to look at the "intruder and self-proclaimed dinner police." I cut in quickly because I could see the wind-up coming, and well, we didn't need a scene. I jovially informed the dinner policewoman that he'd already eaten, so that was that, and off she went. By that time, Tonya had swallowed her bite and could have made a challenge about nosey parkers not minding their business, but I was fast and was able to nip that in the bud. She sat there steaming over it, I tell ya!
The bit that made me night, though, happened as we were placing orders. Tonya had stopped at a table to talk to someone she knew while we decided to order drinks and crayons before ordering food. But she was taking so long, and Mam was at her wits' end trying to entertain the kiddos, that I went ahead and started to order their food at least. I was glad I did that because the waitress food police was in attendance, and if Tonya didn't like the patrons noticing what O'Hare was eating, she wouldn't have been too thrilled with our waitress.
"What would you like?" The waitress asked O'Hare.
"A sweet tooth sundae, three scoops of vanilla ice cream, caramel topping, nuts with whipped cream and a cherry."
"No, I mean for dinner, what would you like to order?" She said.
He explained that he had already eaten, and no, he didn't want an appetiser; could he just have the sundae, please? Well, ok, but if he changed his mind, etc., etc., etc. He did know that a hearty dinner would help a growing boy like himself. Yudda, yadda, yadda!
"And what will you have?" She asked Guido after the lecture on healthy eating.
"I'll . . . I'll . . . I'll . . . "
"Really dere?" Mam said to him exasperated. "Dere be grilled cheese like ya like, hot dogs, hamburgers, pizza."
"I'll have... I'll have... uhhhhhh," Guido said, looking at the ceiling and not the menu.
"Grilled cheese, he'll have da grilled cheese sandwich wit French fries," Mam said frustrated.
"Is that what you want?" I asked him.
"Yup." He said unfazed.
"And the little guy here, what would you like?" The waitress asked.
And the best part of me night was his answer.
"A banana."
Yup, an ice cream sundae, a grilled cheese sannie and a banana.
Gabe
Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved
The bit that made me night, though, happened as we were placing orders. Tonya had stopped at a table to talk to someone she knew while we decided to order drinks and crayons before ordering food. But she was taking so long, and Mam was at her wits' end trying to entertain the kiddos, that I went ahead and started to order their food at least. I was glad I did that because the waitress food police was in attendance, and if Tonya didn't like the patrons noticing what O'Hare was eating, she wouldn't have been too thrilled with our waitress.
"What would you like?" The waitress asked O'Hare.
"A sweet tooth sundae, three scoops of vanilla ice cream, caramel topping, nuts with whipped cream and a cherry."
"No, I mean for dinner, what would you like to order?" She said.
He explained that he had already eaten, and no, he didn't want an appetiser; could he just have the sundae, please? Well, ok, but if he changed his mind, etc., etc., etc. He did know that a hearty dinner would help a growing boy like himself. Yudda, yadda, yadda!
"And what will you have?" She asked Guido after the lecture on healthy eating.
"I'll . . . I'll . . . I'll . . . "
"Really dere?" Mam said to him exasperated. "Dere be grilled cheese like ya like, hot dogs, hamburgers, pizza."
"I'll have... I'll have... uhhhhhh," Guido said, looking at the ceiling and not the menu.
"Grilled cheese, he'll have da grilled cheese sandwich wit French fries," Mam said frustrated.
"Is that what you want?" I asked him.
"Yup." He said unfazed.
"And the little guy here, what would you like?" The waitress asked.
And the best part of me night was his answer.
"A banana."
Yup, an ice cream sundae, a grilled cheese sannie and a banana.
Gabe
Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved
ROFLMAO you're funny! You think it's gonna get easier? Not so much. This is one year, one kid. Prepare for premature grey hair and little trips to your happy place!
ReplyDeleteMaybe baby will be the next Bernie madoff?
DeleteYou mean Guido. He's inventive.
Deletei love your youngest dinner request that was a good one
ReplyDeleteYou would think with the evil clown craze the teachers might have dressed as carnival barkers instead, LOL. Any frightened children? ;-)~
ReplyDeleteNo actually. They were having too much fun and the parents were too focused on their watches and how much longer the torture would last LOL.
DeleteAw. That is so cute he wanted a banana. Love that kid.
Delete