17 January, 2018

Boy O Boy O Boy!

17 January 2018
893

R. Linda:

It snowed last night, and it snowed all day today and it is still snowing. That should make your day I be sure. Because it snowed the kiddos and Tonya had the day off but not so for meself, I had to trek on down to Boston. While I was gone, things were not as uneventful as one might hope, and with three boyos things are always eventful.

Tonya had an earache so she wanted to sleep but she couldn't for the housebound kiddos who were running through the place like it was an obstacle course. Mam finally got them in hand and told them to go out and do some sledding off the hill that goes towards the pond. Yes, she did say that forgetting there be a pond at the bottom, but luckily it was frozen so if they slid on out, they'd be okay unless they started jumping up and down then well . . . Mam would be out there in a wetsuit fetching them from the freezing water.

Tonya and she were sitting in the front room sipping tea where they could keep an eye out on the rambunctious lot.

"Do ye have tree sledges fer da boyos now?" Mam asked Tonya.

"There are two, the two younger ones share. Guido puts his brother in front of him and guides the sled. . . usually." Tonya said thinking about that.

"Well, it lucks ta me lyck they haf' tree sledges it duz," Mam observed watching them.

And indeed they did! Tonya craned her neck to look, teacup in midair puzzled look on her face.

"Hum, that looks like . . . no cannot be but it does look like . . ." Tony's voice trailed off in mid-sentence.

"Lyck wot?" Me Mam asked.

"Like . . . like . . . like the old cap to the septic tank," Tonya said. "Yes, that's what they have."

Well, as you can imagine what she said dawned on them both at the same time and putting teacups down with a clatter they both got up to go shout out the front door at the wee one who was having a splendid time sledding in the septic top. The last time I saw that thing, the septic guy had come and told us we needed a more heavy-duty lid for the tank. This he brought and screwed on and the flimsy plastic lid he left nearby. I know it be all me fault that I was supposed to go out and remove the old lid, but I forgot. So it's been out there and well, I could see where it looked like a garbage bin lid and well . . . to a wee brain it was a great sledge because the wee body fit perfectly in it. I can also remember the lid was none too clean. I'll leave it at that.

When they came in the wee one was taken by me Mam directly to the tub and that be that. I got a phone call from the wife of what occurred with orders that when I got home I was to remove the offending lid.

But that's not all that happened. The good news was I got out of work early so I got home around 4:40. While I had been driving home, the kiddos, refreshed from hot chocolate and homemade hot cross buns (and a bath for one of them) got unruly again and were sent outside this time to make a snowman.

As I pulled into me garage, the three boyos greeted me from the backyard pleading with me to come see their snowman. They were quite proud of it, they had a carrot for the nose which they didn't need because the youngest crowned Mr. Snowman with his big bear hat, and Mam had given them an old blue scarf to dress Mr. S up. So I walked up to him and admired him as a piece of great snow art. Then I noticed something amiss.

"Uh, what's that?" I asked pointing to the bottom of the snowman. "Someone drop a carrot?"

"Oh that," Guido pointed, "that's his wiener."

Ok then. This was the first snowman I'd ever seen with a wiener. Uh-huh.

"Who's idea was that?" I asked looking at their cheery and proud faces.

"MINE!" The wee one piped up.

"No, it wasn't, it was mine too," Guido said.

"And you O'Hare?" I asked the eldest.

"Biologically it is accurate." Says he.

Oh boy. While we were standing there Mam came out to see what the fuss was about and to tell us to quiet ourselves Tonya was napping.

I sent the boyos inside, chiding them to keep the noise down, and saw Mam squinting her eyes at the snowman . . . snowbear.

"Nice job wouldn't you say?" I queried.

"Oh ay, very goud job." She said as I turned to leave, "But dey dropped a carrot."

I turned back and saw her pointing at the wiener.

"No, the carrot is up there under the hat."

She looked at the carrot under the hat and then at the one below and it sort of dawned on her, but she couldn't imagine what she was thinking was right.

"Yup, they did," I said and took her stunned into silence self inside.

She's still sitting with brows knit sipping her tea as if she's not sure she's in the real world.

"Welcome to the world of boys," I said to her as I joined her.

"Ay, and I haf' one of me own an' he hasn't got rid of dat septic cap."

I looked at her and shook me head. I kept sipping me tea and as time has gone by and she be mellow from her many cuppas, I still have not removed that lid and have no intentions of doing so until next spring. Anyway, I put the photo of the snowman below so you can marvel at the anatomically correct Mr. Snowbear.

I think that's one of Dragon's brooms he's holding

Gabe
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7 comments:

Capt Jaack said...

ROFLMAO

Fionnula said...

i love your stories. my sides hurt from laughing.

mobit22 said...

LMAO They're YOUR boys! That age for body part fascination .

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

Yee-ah there is that.

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

Thank you Kumar for your comment which said: "Nice article, always loved to read your posts." Unfortunately, you added an advert at the end and I cannot post that. Only comments pertaining to the blog will be published. All comments with advertisement attachments will be deleted.

Dew said...

ROFL. That is hysterical. As a mum of three boys I can identify lolololol

Tomas said...

That was good! What fine lads you are raising Gabe, LOL. Three lads can be a handful all at once I am sure. Just ask your mammy. That was a fun read, thanks for the laughs.