31 December, 2009

O'Malley

27 May 2005
133

R. Linda:

There is an unfortunate end to the tale of the missing Mr. O'Malley. It has taken me several days to get over the shock, it has. This last weekend I was asked by Flanagan if I wanted the things I had left behind, and if I didn't he was unceremoniously going to trash said articles, unless I came to pick them up.

Well now, I made arrangements for such and he informed yours truly that he would not be at home, for he had some appointment. Being I still had me key to the old apartment, I told him I'd let meself in, take me stuff and leave the key with the Super. He was good with that idea and told me to help meself to a soft drink or beer in his new fridge if I so wanted. Nice fellow that Flanagan I be thinking.

So it was that Miss Tonya and I arrived at the old flat and sneaking past Tink's door we crept up the creaky steps, only for that ugly mutt of hers to start barking up a storm. You'd have thought we'd been in and out burgling the entire building by the ruckus the hound made. Out flew the wee faery, eyes all squinty looking to see who the intruders were and where they were off to.

Of course, as soon as she saw me, she flew up the stairs faery dust and all, and upon arrival, and her eyes fell upon the wife, the smile disappeared and a wicked grimace took over her faery features making it more screwed up than usual.

"Oh it's you," she said as if monetarily enlightened as well as extremely disappointed.

We smiled back and knocked upon the door of Alison's abode because we had told her we'd be up to say hello. The three of us stood in uncomfortable silence, me and Ton hoping the wee Tink would go back to her barking mutt, but no, she continued to wait with us.

Alison seemed surprised to see Tink with us, not as much as we were that she was still standing silently between me and Tonya. The quick thinking Tonya decided that we needed to spend no time at Alison's, but instead should go retrieve me things and get the hell out of there before Tink had a meltdown.

Alison, understanding the situation (it was plain to see with her own two eyes that Tink was working herself up), suggested the same and over to me old flat we all shuffled. I got the door open and there in a neat pile was me knapsack and tennis racket. I hauled it all up, then set it down as Tonya declared she could use a cold one. So off to the new fridge, I went.

Lo and behold, Flanagan had spared no expense on the new appliance. It was stainless steel, 30 cubic feet which immediately had Ton drooling. I was thinking $1200 setback for Flanagan's wallet, and as long as it wasn't me wallet, more power to him. I got the beers for all of us and Alison and Tonya were discussing the merits of the refrigerator while the silent and seething Tinkerbelle stood sipping her ale giving me evil looks.

Alison was all enthralled that this particular model fridge had a freezer below and boasted quite a large compartment she thought. Me wife not to be outdone, wanted to see just how big the freezer was and without a thought, she pulled the drawer open.

What we found was just too much to write about. It boggles the senses it does. So much so, I must end this here and now. It be with dire warning I tell you if you want to know what we found, be prepared and scroll below because we have a pic of what we found in the freezer. Hold on to your hat and your heart it isn't pretty.

Mr. Seamus O'Malley - RIP



Ok, ok, so I be foolin' with your head. This be not Mr. O, just a jape I be having. LMAO Love the meat shoes too!

Gabe
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